Author Archives: Joel

About Joel

You shouldn't ask these questions of a paranoid recluse, you know.

“On the plus side, nobody actually beat him up.”

Since I never use the Book of Face, I have to keep being reminded who the hell Mark Zuckerberg is. Maybe somebody can clue me in to why anyone would want him to be president. But he’s making noises like … Continue reading

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Don’t worry about it. My first wife was a ‘tard. She’s a pilot now.

I have seen the future… Many College Students are ‘Book Virgins’ …and people, it ain’t pretty. But seriously – remember when people who went to college were all smart and shit? Now you need a degree just to qualify to … Continue reading

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There’s those legendary communication skills at work…

Time to refill my glaucoma meds. To do so, traditionally, I have to trek to the big town about 50 miles away. Normally I catch a ride with neighbors D&L, who were actually prompting me to do so – so … Continue reading

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Becoming intimate with your tools…

A penniless hermit will find himself doing things he wasn’t taught to expect as a child. Like taking a moment in the morning to renew the duct tape wrapping on his long-broken plastic foot so it’ll go in his boot. … Continue reading

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The Gulch’s weather likes its drama

Last week’s heatwave ended with a whole series of bangs, exactly as expected. A thunderboomer cell built gradually and then mostly went off to the NE to do its thing. We got not much more than a heavy sprinkle here, … Continue reading

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When you have more, you spend more.

It’s an iron law. Three months ago I doubled the Lair’s battery capacity – tripled it, really, though two of the six batteries aren’t connected to the inverter – and so now I can run more electrical appliances if I … Continue reading

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Unexpected oopsies

My friends S&L spent a week in their home state of Minnesota. L kindly brought me a gift of instant beer bread in a funny/ironic container… It’s got the flour and leavening you need for basic no-knead bread, amusingly sealed … Continue reading

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QoD: “Tell me again the net good these people serve?” edition

[Y]our hands should be visible on the steering wheel and you should not be moving at all. Don’t try to get your wallet out or reach into your glove compartment for your insurance card. Remain perfectly still! Listen to what … Continue reading

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The Gulch becomes a hotbed of decadence

I had a very odd thought this afternoon. I had dug out my bag of winter gloves and hats, stored in the rodent-resistant shed, so that I could add a couple of watch caps I’d bought and some gloves that … Continue reading

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Care Packages!

Landlady came up a day early, which brought Christmas on Friday! Yay! Longtime Friend of the Blog ilo jones sent no less than four boxes of stuff. I got electrical stuff from Edward, the fellow who sent me that great … Continue reading

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Hopefully we’re over the top…

From here on to rain the afternoon temperatures are supposed to moderate somewhat; this is the first forecast in four where the temperature maxes out in mere double digits. Nights cool off but they don’t promise when – this is … Continue reading

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“The Reasonably Scared Cop Rule”

I haven’t said anything about the Philando Castile murder verdict, even though it’s been on my mind and it should be on the mind of every potentially shady-looking gun carrier in the country, because I just didn’t know what to … Continue reading

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Redneck bakery update

Still works fine! Runs just a little hotter than I’m used to. Did the same thing last year, should have remembered to adjust the baking time.

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The problem with political news is that it’s too funny to ignore.

Case in point: Fifty-three percent of respondents to the CBS News poll said they approve of Congress’s response to last week’s shooting, which left five people, including House Majority Whip Steve Scalise (R-La.), injured. Twenty-nine percent said they disapproved of … Continue reading

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Welcome to the redneck bakery.

Seven thirty in the blessed AM and it’s already over 85 indoors. I’m out of bread, so baking must ensue. But I do not want to light the Lair’s oven. After I covered the dough for its first rise I … Continue reading

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Hiding from the sun

We have at least one good heat wave per summer, usually before Monsoon, and this one is no surprise. It’s unusually hot by a couple of degrees, though. The outdoor sensor on my cool digital indoor/outdoor thermometer has gone to … Continue reading

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Things I never understood about Summer…

I never understood why summer officially begins on a date when “summer” has clearly been underway for over a month. Ditto winter, of course: If you haven’t already frozen solid by the official start of winter, you’re not trying hard … Continue reading

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Remember when “the media” still claimed oracle-like objectivity?

Way back when it was only “the press,” I’m told, objectivity was neither claimed nor sought. Newspapers tended to be reliably in the tank for one party or another and said so. That’s an old tradition in this country. But … Continue reading

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Maybe I can make it into a bandshell?

Build it and they will … stay away, I hope.

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Bits are falling off my ride, Part Deux

Sometimes the loudest sound a machine can make is “click.” Like, when you turn the key to crank the starter, and there ain’t no starter. Check on the gear selector, maybe the problem is the neutral switch. Nope. I hate … Continue reading

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