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They say that Louis XIV had the inscription Ultima Ratio Regum cast into all the cannon of the French Army. It means “The Ultimate Argument of Kings,” and that always struck me as one of the most honest and up-front things any ruler or would-be ruler ever said. “We can dress it up prettier than this, but when it comes down to the unvarnished truth this is what it’s about: You’ll do as I say or I’ll send my goons to kill you.”
I thought about that for a long time. If there’s an ultimate argument, it seems only logical that there must be an ultimate answer. For years I thought the ultimate answer must be the bullets in my rifle, but it never seemed quite right. I’ve got bullets – he’s got frigging Cannon Balls. I mean, if there were three hundred million rifles throwing bullets at him, then maybe. But we all know that’s not going to happen. So if there’s an ultimate answer to his ultimate argument, it sure as hell ain’t bullets.
It finally came to me – and that’s when I abandoned the city and most of my stuff, and gave all that was behind me a good stiff Randian Shrug.
The ultimate answer to kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh.
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Author Archives: Joel
…you might be a redneck.
Monday I had guests at the Secret Lair, which is not a common thing. Big Brother and New SIL stopped over on a long road trip west. This meant that part of Sunday got spent cleaning the Lair – also … Continue reading
Keeping butter without a refrigerator…
…has always been something of a problem for me. For several years I grumped along on the cheapest margarin, on the assumption that most would be thrown away in summer when it melted into vegetable oil and promptly went rancid. … Continue reading
Big Brother came to visit yesterday!
On a long road trip west. We agreed we should have planned it better and will next time, because while he was willing and indeed looking for an excuse to stay a couple of days, there’s just no project going … Continue reading
The Ammo Counter of Futility
In the crappy little town nearest where I live, the only drugstore is also the only ammo retailer. In theory. According to the lady I talked to yesterday morning they actually do move some ammo – it’s just that the … Continue reading
Books and simple pleasures
Here’s something I wrote 16 years ago on an old moribund forum, and just rediscovered today… One of the pleasures I used to share with my wife, when she was my wife and when we shared pleasures, was reading aloud … Continue reading
It may seem an incongruous thing for a desert hermit to say, but…
…right now I have access to an awful lot of driftwood. It washed down from the canyons in those big floods we had in 2017 and 18. Near the cabin the wash takes a big U-turn, and when it overflowed … Continue reading
Happy dog!
Got some visitors at the watering station a few days ago… Even with the few stills the game camera gave me – which prompted me at last to come back yesterday afternoon with the manual to re-adjust the camera settings … Continue reading
Random windy spring moments
Spring at last! There’s no doubt we’ll get random wintry nights – in fact since the pear tree is in bloom it’s almost guaranteed within the week – and I haven’t done anything as hubristic as putting the woodstove to … Continue reading
The Secret Lair’s new floor!
Serendipity! The Lair’s main room is getting a new floor, earlier and with less hassle than feared. Two weeks ago some neighbors asked me, “Hey, can you use some laminated flooring?” To which I did not reply aloud, “This is … Continue reading
Sigh. I’m an out-of-touch boomer.
So I scored 300 .44 magnum cases from some guy, as one does. Dumped them in the tumbler. Brought them into the reloading shack and started sizing and depriming them. And stuck inside one of the cases I found one … Continue reading
T-shirt weather! Loving life.
On Thursday I took the bike to town, didn’t even wear a jacket. Just a loose shirt for a gun burka. Didn’t feel so hot yesterday, and anyway yesterday it was cloudy all day though quite mild. But today it’s … Continue reading
I relocated the new game camera several days ago…
…on a tree at the cattle waterer, higher than an elk might find convenient to rearrange. Certainly higher than I find convenient. Been waiting with anticipation to see how they’d react, but unfortunately the elk have made themselves scarce for … Continue reading
Warm breeze! Open windows!
It’s been a pretty cold March overall. This is the first time we’ve hit seventies in the shade. First day this year I’ve opened the cabin windows. And I’m loving it. Warm wind makes me think maybe we’re actually creeping … Continue reading
Haven’t written lately, because…
…there’s been nothing worth writing about. I took that pic Wednesday morning – it snowed ALL day off and on. The weather was supposed to improve yesterday and drastically improve today – I’m going to find that miserable excuse for … Continue reading
Wow, glad I didn’t wait.
I just got back to the cabin from taking care of T&S’s dogs and horse, and… …for once my timing was pretty good. This suddenly turned into the sort of morning that makes you wish your Jeep had windshield wipers. … Continue reading
Joel eavesdrops on skinnydipping couple. Elk take revenge.
I left the new game camera at the cattle watering station for most of the week. Mostly just got thousands of pictures of migrating robins… On one occasion a pair of ravens decided to take a bath, not heeding my … Continue reading
Home again…
It was only two nights and parts of three days, but being away from my own hermetic routine always seems like it’s taking forever. I’ll still be going up to T&S’s place twice a day at least through Monday but … Continue reading
New Official TUAK Game Camera!
It arrived over the weekend as the result of a very generous gift from a friend of the blog. I left it up a few days to see what adjustments needed to be made in the settings – I see … Continue reading
Simultaneous caretaking gigs. This is gonna get weird.
I have two sets of neighbors going for trips. D&L are going to the city for some surgery that’s been put off due to all the weirdness – between their animals and the peculiar needs of their heating infrastructure, their … Continue reading