In which history messily repeats itself…

Exactly one year ago this month, Big Brother sent me a dozen small bottles of crack sauce, the substance that can make even the most indifferent cook – like me – look like a genius. I received eleven intact ones and a big mess…


A few days ago, as previously reported, I opened the last of those bottles.

Big Brother was watching. Shortly after that post I received the following email from my maildrop…

Good news! You got a care package (actually, you’ve gotten a crap-ton of them, but only one today)

Bad news! It was damaged & leaking oozy orange stuff

Good news! You have a full resupply of crack sauce, along with some spam and meal-thingies.

Bad news! You have one less bottle of crack sauce than the sender intended

Good news! I washed it off all the other stuff and repacked them into a different box.

Bad news! My hands are sticky and smell like crack sauce…

Of course there are different schools of thought. Phil over at The Vulgar Curmudgeon has his own favorite…

About Joel

You shouldn't ask these questions of a paranoid recluse, you know.
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5 Responses to In which history messily repeats itself…

  1. jabrwok says:

    Shipping glass bottles is always risky. I’ve never tried it, but I imagine that spraying some Great Stuff in between the bottles would pretty much eliminate the risk.

  2. Mike says:

    Nice! Yesterday I was shopping at our local market when the manager came up to me and told me the order of “Crack Sauce” was in. He said that of the 50 bottles he received a week ago there were only 11 left and that he would be keeping it in stock because it was selling well. I picked up 2 and tried some out last night when we had a port tenderloin on the Q. It was everything you said it would be. Thanks for the heads up about this.

  3. Mark Matis says:

    You should also have some metal thingies waiting for you at the drop. Although I suspect I was stupid about sizing on half of them. Wrong shank.

  4. anonymous says:

    You have an awesome Big Bro sir, congratulations on your luck having that. Not everybody is blessed having family and friends that care enough to send items to people items they like.

    You must be doing something right.

  5. Andrew says:

    There is an art to packing small bottles for travel. Does your brother buy it by the box, already packed by Crack-Sause Maker? If so, then have him open up and wrap each bottle in a paper towel, including bottom and top, and repack. And then wrap in plastic bag and pack in another box. That way if one breaks, no problem.

    Strange question, do the bottles break at the bottom or the at the neck? If the neck, some packers put an extra carboard tube around the neck. If the bottom, add a panel of cardboard to the bottom of the box.

    Good luck with next year’s shipment.

To the stake with the heretic!