If you threaten my life and kill my dog…and I don’t give you free food…is that a “human rights violation?”

Because Jimmuh Carter says it is. Seriously.

So here’s the deal, as seen from my cave in the high desert. There’s this country called South Korea. It’s run by the usual bunch of statist kleptocrats – kinda like here, but with Koreans. More factory riots, less Hillary Clinton. Then there’s this other country called North Korea which is run by an alien master from the planet Looney-Toons. He has to keep his people at least half-starved, because he knows damn well that otherwise they’ll notice the lamp posts need decoration. If NK has lamp posts, which I don’t know. Probably the NK people have eaten them with fish sauce by now. If they’re allowed near fish. Which I don’t know.

Anyway – the crazy guy from NK keeps doing things like declaring “holy war” against SK and threatening it with nuclear weapons, and sinking their ships for no apparent reason. Everybody in the world except people who still think Joe Stalin wasn’t all that bad recognizes that the NK government is one of the most oppressive in the world, and treats its own people abominably.

Yet somehow it’s all America’s fault. According to a former American president.

Wow. Doesn’t this old guy have keepers, or something?

Obligatory Team America clip (NSFW):

About Joel

You shouldn't ask these questions of a paranoid recluse, you know.
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3 Responses to If you threaten my life and kill my dog…and I don’t give you free food…is that a “human rights violation?”

  1. That movie was the cause of one of my most embarrassing parental moments. I stupidly thought it was part of the old Thunderbird series. got it rented for the kiddies, put it on for them while I was in the kitchen cooking dinner….I didn’t know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh the humanity…. I feel shame.

  2. LJH says:

    Jimmy Carter is proof positive one can have a really high IQ and still be an idiot.

  3. Anonymous says:

    Does this mean that Jimmy was guilty of a human rights violation when he refused to sell grain to the USSR in ’80-81 after the USSR invaded Afghanistan?
    International politics can be so confusing. I keep forgetting which nations are fashionable to hate.

To the stake with the heretic!