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They say that Louis XIV had the inscription Ultima Ratio Regum cast into all the cannon of the French Army. It means “The Ultimate Argument of Kings,” and that always struck me as one of the most honest and up-front things any ruler or would-be ruler ever said. “We can dress it up prettier than this, but when it comes down to the unvarnished truth this is what it’s about: You’ll do as I say or I’ll send my goons to kill you.”
I thought about that for a long time. If there’s an ultimate argument, it seems only logical that there must be an ultimate answer. For years I thought the ultimate answer must be the bullets in my rifle, but it never seemed quite right. I’ve got bullets – he’s got frigging Cannon Balls. I mean, if there were three hundred million rifles throwing bullets at him, then maybe. But we all know that’s not going to happen. So if there’s an ultimate answer to his ultimate argument, it sure as hell ain’t bullets.
It finally came to me – and that’s when I abandoned the city and most of my stuff, and gave all that was behind me a good stiff Randian Shrug.
The ultimate answer to kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh.
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Monthly Archives: November 2025
The moon was bright as a reading light…
Tobie and I went out at five for the first pee, and the full moon was so high and bright in the cloudless sky that I didn’t even need my headlamp. An hour later I looked out the kitchen window … Continue reading
“…And then I did something clever with it.”
I HATE when I do this. I was doing some stuff in the closet. Longtime readers know the Secret Lair has exactly one closet, built in 2017 with the bedroom addition. The addition is eight by sixteen, five feet of … Continue reading
Winter prep stuff…
When BB and I put a roof over the new front porch in 2019, at midsummer it became clear that I had one small problem. An hour before sundown, on the hottest days of the year when you’re really most … Continue reading
Hate when that happens…
Saturday morning. Getting ready for the weekly water run. I’ve got two empty 3-gallon water bottles and one with maybe a gallon left. So I take that bottle and I fill the ready-use drinking water pitcher, and the teapot. And … Continue reading
