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They say that Louis XIV had the inscription Ultima Ratio Regum cast into all the cannon of the French Army. It means “The Ultimate Argument of Kings,” and that always struck me as one of the most honest and up-front things any ruler or would-be ruler ever said. “We can dress it up prettier than this, but when it comes down to the unvarnished truth this is what it’s about: You’ll do as I say or I’ll send my goons to kill you.”
I thought about that for a long time. If there’s an ultimate argument, it seems only logical that there must be an ultimate answer. For years I thought the ultimate answer must be the bullets in my rifle, but it never seemed quite right. I’ve got bullets – he’s got frigging Cannon Balls. I mean, if there were three hundred million rifles throwing bullets at him, then maybe. But we all know that’s not going to happen. So if there’s an ultimate answer to his ultimate argument, it sure as hell ain’t bullets.
It finally came to me – and that’s when I abandoned the city and most of my stuff, and gave all that was behind me a good stiff Randian Shrug.
The ultimate answer to kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh.
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Author Archives: Joel
Time to rebuild the porch steps…
I was able to scrounge some used lumber a week or so ago… Nearly new, since it came from some interior framing. I had asked Neighbor S if I could tag along next time he went to the Lowes in … Continue reading
Monsoon is getting more intrusive…
It didn’t even rain very much yesterday afternoon, at least not down here. I suspect the rain was heavier up on the plateau, because the wash ran just a little bit. That in itself isn’t all that significant. What I … Continue reading
Even my Plan B has improved…
It’s on the order of five years ago that S&L moved to the Gulch fulltime, and L started insisting on washing my clothes once a week. I did not vigorously demur: In addition to a washer and dryer, S&L have … Continue reading
Monsoon’s early this year
And it’s a pain in the neck. Started abruptly last week, and it’s forecast for every afternoon in the foreseeable future. At least it’s cooler, and we could use the moisture. But it’s still a bother.
This is the sort of day that’s less unpleasant from a distance.
The crazies are out there and I’m out here. I’m always happy about that but today I’m practically ecstatic. You ever get the impression maybe Washington has too much power over peoples’ lives, no matter which wing of the stinking … Continue reading
The well water here is very hard…
…thick with calcium and iron oxide, and abusive to anything it touches. Galvanized plumbing is right out; the water eats right through it. Plastic won’t dissolve, but calcium deposits eventually gum up moving parts – like toilet valves. So before … Continue reading
“Dammit, Tobie…”
Laid down grout on the bathroom floor this morning. Went outside to clean the bucket. Forgot something very important… No big deal, just an annoyance and mostly at myself: Of course he went straight in to investigate. Totally my fault.
Or maybe the Jeep is plotting against me…
Something extremely weird happened yesterday. Around 3 in the afternoon I loaded Tobie in the Jeep for chicken chores but we didn’t go anywhere, because the Jeep had no electrical activity of any kind. I mean capital-D Dead. It was … Continue reading
If there were an Olympic event in procrastination…
…I like to think I’d be the betting man’s favorite for U.S. gold. Yup: Only five years after I tiled the main cabin, and more than a year after I put a fake-wood floor over the tiles which hadn’t worked … Continue reading
When Tobie wants to help…
Usually Tobie is content to nap for a couple of hours after his long morning walkie. Since it has unexpectedly turned rainy in the afternoons I intended to take advantage of that to sneak off and get some ammo reloading … Continue reading
…and then I did something that hurt my heart…
Okay, so yesterday after the rain I roughed in the zero on the revolver’s new sight. Then this morning before the rain I took it out to 25 yards with a rest and fined it in… And THEN I had … Continue reading
A personal encounter: Did I miss a shot or dodge a bullet?
My summertime routine for going to town in the middle of the week, a relatively rare practice, is to drive the Jeep to the county road and then take my ebike the rest of the way. This is, admittedly, a … Continue reading
Red dot installation on a S&W Revolver…
One of the things that pleased me about my third-hand Model 69 was that in the redesign S&W was farsighted enough to take the possibility of aftermarket sights into consideration. I found an adapter plate from a site called EGW … Continue reading
And here we go…
Oh, I’ve been waiting for this. Got the email late yesterday afternoon and just got back from riding my bike into town. Lords of shooting please don’t let me screw this up, because… …I’m about to put a red dot … Continue reading
“Alex Jones is where you go for real news, and CNN is where you go for outrageous conspiracy theories.”
I heard that phrase on a podcast that was playing in my ear while I cooked breakfast, and rushed over to write it down before I lost it. It pretty much encapsulates the upside-down world I’ve been trying to wrap … Continue reading
It’s beginning to look a lot like Moscow…
The bread shelf at the crappy little market in the crappy little town nearest where I live… Glad I bake my own, though of course the price of flour is going the way of all things. The rise in the … Continue reading
The internet is not drunken-redneck-proof. For the record.
So shortly after I posted the below, my connection to the outside world abruptly went away. I live down in a hollow in the middle of the wilderness, nowhere near line-of-sight of any cell tower. Until a couple of years … Continue reading
He’s never ever gonna hear the end of this…
Yup. I’ve been dad to a daughter. I got things this wrong on a fairly regular basis.
Reduce Reuse Recycle?
It’s funny: The political climate in this country has gotten so toxic that even ‘living green’ has an element of hostility to it. I’m kind of living the stereotypical green dream, but I imagine that your average greenie would rather … Continue reading
Shadow and the Water Well
I was futzing around in my desk drawer last night and came up with a thumb drive that had gotten smooshed to the back. Had no idea what was on it. Among other things were a bunch of stories I … Continue reading