Yeah, the clown collar’s back. Fritz’s ear is fine, but he’s got a new sore on his front leg.
He’s done this before: He gets this nervous thing where he just licks and licks one place on his leg until it’s a bleeding mess. This one hasn’t gone that far, and I’m hoping to prevent it. I tried a couple of days of shaming him out of it, which oddly enough has worked before. Fritz is almost unique among the dogs in that he actually cares what I want. But this morning it was worse, and since we’ve worked out a way to keep the clown collar on him it was sadly time for the evil contrivance to come out of retirement. I really enjoyed taking it off him the last time; he’s cumbersome enough without it. But his history is too clear: Right now it’s just raw skin, but he’ll lick it to the bone if I don’t stop him. Once it’s healed, he’ll eventually leave it alone.
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They say that Louis XIV had the inscription Ultima Ratio Regum cast into all the cannon of the French Army. It means “The Ultimate Argument of Kings,” and that always struck me as one of the most honest and up-front things any ruler or would-be ruler ever said. “We can dress it up prettier than this, but when it comes down to the unvarnished truth this is what it’s about: You’ll do as I say or I’ll send my goons to kill you.”
I thought about that for a long time. If there’s an ultimate argument, it seems only logical that there must be an ultimate answer. For years I thought the ultimate answer must be the bullets in my rifle, but it never seemed quite right. I’ve got bullets – he’s got frigging Cannon Balls. I mean, if there were three hundred million rifles throwing bullets at him, then maybe. But we all know that’s not going to happen. So if there’s an ultimate answer to his ultimate argument, it sure as hell ain’t bullets.
It finally came to me – and that’s when I abandoned the city and most of my stuff, and gave all that was behind me a good stiff Randian Shrug.
The ultimate answer to kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh.
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I have been told that this habit is from boredom or anxiety. I hardly think your dogs are bored so perhaps he is a tad anxious about something?
Fritz is…excitable. And yes, he has been more anxious and whiny than usual lately. But I don’t know why. He refuses to have anything to do with the other dogs new to the gulch, and they do make him antsy, but that’s been going on since spring; I don’t understand why it would be worse now. What else might be troubling him, I don’t know. There’s a lot more activity around him than he was used to, but again that’s been happening for months. It’s only recently that he’s been at least showing himself to be disturbed.
You did have your beloved Magnus pass away recently didn’t you? Perhaps it has taken time for this to be work it’s way thru Fritz? A pack is a huge part of a dog’s life, a change like that might take a while to work it’s way out.
Just a guess.
Hm. For some reason I never thought of that. Actually his increased whininess would date from approximately the time Magnus disappeared from his life. Possibly you’ve nailed it.
A friend has put his dog on Prozac for similar issues. I kid you not. Vet-prescribed doggy SSRIs. What a world.
What’s more, it works. The dog is noticeably more mellow and seems happier.
Not suggesting anything, just commenting…
If I remember correctly you once said that Magnus was the alpha dog, the pack leader. Perhaps Fritz is uneasy waiting for a new leader to take over. If another dog doesn’t he might well feel compelled to try.
Has any of the other dogs tried to take over the pack?
No, really not. It would be between Fritz and Ghost, of course, LB is too young to qualify though he’s now substantially bigger than Ghost. Once upon a time Fritz would have jumped at it, but he’s not so young any more himself – he’s mellowed, in that sense.
As for Ghost, he barely acknowledges that there is a pack. The only sign he cares about status is when he warns off other dogs from his choice bed – or when any other dog tries to put the hurt on him. Then he’ll fight, but he doesn’t seem to care about leading. He leaves to stay with the neighbors most weekends, anyway.
Back to Fritz, I really hope he doesn’t try any such thing. He’s a real jackass when he’s arguing status – he overreaches himself and then cowardly backs out or caves. I love him, but he’d be a lousy alpha.
In the meantime I’ve been giving them all a lot of attention, letting them know Uncle Joel’s there for them.