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They say that Louis XIV had the inscription Ultima Ratio Regum cast into all the cannon of the French Army. It means “The Ultimate Argument of Kings,” and that always struck me as one of the most honest and up-front things any ruler or would-be ruler ever said. “We can dress it up prettier than this, but when it comes down to the unvarnished truth this is what it’s about: You’ll do as I say or I’ll send my goons to kill you.”
I thought about that for a long time. If there’s an ultimate argument, it seems only logical that there must be an ultimate answer. For years I thought the ultimate answer must be the bullets in my rifle, but it never seemed quite right. I’ve got bullets – he’s got frigging Cannon Balls. I mean, if there were three hundred million rifles throwing bullets at him, then maybe. But we all know that’s not going to happen. So if there’s an ultimate answer to his ultimate argument, it sure as hell ain’t bullets.
It finally came to me – and that’s when I abandoned the city and most of my stuff, and gave all that was behind me a good stiff Randian Shrug.
The ultimate answer to kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh.
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Author Archives: Joel
So this food nazi said to me, “Ay! See that shark over there? Hold my beer and watch this!”
Disclaimer: Of course we know that everything, including moderation, can be taken to extremes. It’s perfectly well known that some people take healthy concerns so far that they virtually become diseases. So I’m not suggesting that this doesn’t really happen, … Continue reading
I am reminded of the presidential campaign of that hep cat, William Henry Harrison…
That was in 1840, and in fact I believe Hillary may have been just barely old enough to intern on his campaign. So maybe this is where she got the idea. Harrison didn’t have a Youtube video, but he did … Continue reading
The only answer to the police problem is to make them more than human.
I mean, personally I think we’d all be better off without them. Can you think of a single instance in which the supposed cure is not worse than the described disease? But people are conditioned to believe western civilization would … Continue reading
Taking precautions against the promised cattle invasion…
Sometime in ’04 or ’05, Landlady and T planted a whole bunch of fruit trees. Most promptly died. One apple tree managed to survive, though never to fruit, despite being sheared of its foliage year after year by cattle and … Continue reading
Fortunately it hit him in the head, so there was no damage.
I’m not the recoil junky I was when I was young, but I like to think that even at my most heedless period I’d have at least paused to consider possible consequences before agreeing to go along with the joke. … Continue reading
Care packages! And a bleg update.
My brother sent me some stuff, including a bunch of canned meat and a certain item in keeping with the increasingly Spam-related nature of our poor long-suffering blog… …and to my surprise I found they actually did taste rather like … Continue reading
That’s not a packrat nest…
That’s a packrat nest! Or perhaps more accurately a whole series of them, raked together after I pulled up the floor of the old woodshed yesterday. I killed well over a dozen rats in this area over the winter, since … Continue reading
Awesome!
Last time Ian was up we spent quite a lot of time shooting footage for a promotional video I’ve really wanted to see involving Ian’s Vickers gun and a trick rifle target. And it came out BEAUTIFULLY! Go watch it, … Continue reading
Morning Misc at the Gulch…
Those cattle guys keep spending money on this new water station, but so far haven’t actually added cattle. The only animals I’ve seen are a few up near the county road where they always are, miles away. But here they’ve … Continue reading
Prep Work
One thing I’ve known all along is that when I got around to siding the cabin, the hoop shed I’ve used for firewood would have to go. Too close to the wall to work around. This is what’s left with … Continue reading
That’s not infantilizing or anything…
Univ. of Michigan cancels ‘American Sniper’ screening: ‘Made students feel unsafe’ A scheduled movie screening of “American Sniper” at the University of Michigan was abruptly cancelled Tuesday after nearly 300 students and others complained the film perpetuates “negative and misleading … Continue reading
Maybe I should treat bobcats with more respect?
Bobcats are rather more common around here than mountain lions, though rarely seen. And when I do see them they’re usually receding over a rise as fast as they can slink. The single exception was when the boys treed one, … Continue reading
“Welcome to the Arena in the Clouds”
I have a confession: All my life I’ve feared I was living some sort of lie. I claim to love freedom, which means I should find debates about governance fascinating. Conservatism v. Liberalism, Minarchism v. Anarchy: If I were really … Continue reading
Well, this morning I was broke.
I was supposed to go into town with D&L and wondered whether I even should. I needed drinking water so I went ahead and did it, but I only had nine bucks in my pocket so I sure didn’t buy … Continue reading
A quiet Monday morning…
Damn near got blown away at D&L’s yesterday, didn’t sleep at all well overnight, and this morning Uncle Joel is stiff and cranky and mainlining coffee. So while we’re getting our collective self in gear, here’s something else that’s old … Continue reading
So D&L are shopping for another horse…
Which means modifications to the modifications! That far wall was tractor storage, with a lovely set of double doors. Now it’s wood plank siding and new metal exterior, and fence sections for two 10X10 box stalls. During the last round … Continue reading
Where’s she going to be buried?
Hopefully I can work up a good load of piss on my pilgrimage there. Get a load of this headline: Anti-violence activist Sarah Brady dead at 73 Kevin Wilmeth had the same thought I did when I saw that… … … Continue reading
Just a’hangin’ around…
I was going to put this chore off a few days, just because it’s the kind of chore I tend to put off. But J really wanted it fixed right away – he was adamant about it this morning* – … Continue reading
Looks like I should have taken S’s bet…
…whatever it was… Those cattle guys gave up on their cistern repair without even really trying it out. Put in a new cistern… …and a new stock tank. Of a design I’ve never seen before. Wonder how they sealed it … Continue reading









































