Author Archives: Joel

I’m not a hairy guy. Not at all. Hair just doesn’t seem to be a part of my genetic makeup. Which explains why, though I haven’t cut my hair since December 2006 (on the occasion of my daughter’s wedding, which … Continue reading →

Free the ATF From the Gun Lobby This meme of the ATF as an oppressed, battered victim of the NRA patriarchy and bullying gun owners gets hauled out and dusted off periodically, including whenever somebody’s trying to get F-Troop an … Continue reading →

For educational purposes only, absolutely no endorsement expressed or implied, the staff and management of TUAK tremulously introduce you to the man who made a shotgun from a caulking gun. Seriously, I guarandamntee you there are far better, safer ways … Continue reading →

So we’re in what feels like day 20 of the summer’s first heat wave. The very first day of it reminded me of something I strongly dislike about this laptop, which is that it runs really hot. (It’s a feature … Continue reading →

I guess it just seems like a good time to re-read it. According to Amazon’s Movers & Shakers countdown, three different editions of George Orwell’s alt-history book Nineteen Eighty-Four have shot up hundreds of spots on the chart since news … Continue reading →

I’ve been avoiding the NSA/IRS/DOJ/whatever thing, because none of it comes as any shock (hell, it was never really a secret; remember TIA? Did you really think they weren’t going to go ahead and do that anyway?) and frankly it’s … Continue reading →

I’m in the anomalous position of effusively praising a dog for waking me up and getting me out of bed when there was no outside threat to be warned of. I mean, c’mon. Technically, waking me out of a sound … Continue reading →

When it began to appear that I’d have to actually learn something about chickens, I bought this book called The Small-Scale Poultry Flock, and among many other things it talks about a “deep-litter” method of developing compost, through the use … Continue reading →

Batshit crazy! Yeah! That’s the phrase I was looking for… ‘Pro-Gun’ Ricin mailer turns out to be Hollywood anti-gunner I had a wife once, and after a while she didn’t like me much. And I thought some of the lengths … Continue reading →

…and everybody agrees it’s not supposed to happen in early June. But the weather does what it does, and anybody who tries to predict it is taking a sucker’s bet. Yesterday it hit triple digits for the first time this … Continue reading →

Ohhh. Uncle Joel slept long time. Which is good, because the past few nights Uncle Joel hasn’t slept all that long. Nothing wrong, really, just old-man insomnia that comes and goes. But I woke up feeling like something run over … Continue reading →

Little Bear has a favorite tree. I know it must be his favorite tree, because in the approximately 1.5 years we’ve lived in the Secret Lair he has wrapped his cable around it approximately 1,430,826,973 times. I know this, because … Continue reading →

About a month ago, Ian posted a short video about a kid’s pistol from the sixties that caused almost painful nostalgia. I remember that pistol as one I saw advertised when I was a boy, and OH I wanted one. … Continue reading →

…because a long time ago he wrote a novel in which some people admonished some other people to give up cruelty to plants and learn to subsist on air and light, and I thought that was taking satire to a … Continue reading →

This morning Ghost and LB discovered that a big pack rat – that they had previously shared the yard with fairly harmoniously – had built a big nest right in their favorite spot under the Secret Lair. Conflict ensued. I … Continue reading →

“It’s about the gigantic Cray supercomputers that are listening to your telephone calls. “And by the way – Steve from Dallas? You can stop worrying. Your wife already knows. And so does her lawyer, with whom she’s been getting it … Continue reading →

There’s a pack rat under the Secret Lair. Heh. I say again, There’s a pack rat under the Secret Lair. No, seriously, there really is a pack rat under the Secret Lair, and the boys have taken it as a … Continue reading →

That’s gotta sting…

It’s back. Now, here’s the glorious irony of the Christmas tree tax. In theory, this doesn’t affect me in any way because I’ve never bought a Christmas tree in my life. The tax is a 15 cent (at the moment) … Continue reading →

But this guy is so completely tone deaf – and getting so much ink for it – that I became annoyed. You wouldn’t like me when I’m annoyed. How about this for a compromise, Dr. Swindell? You go away and … Continue reading →