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They say that Louis XIV had the inscription Ultima Ratio Regum cast into all the cannon of the French Army. It means “The Ultimate Argument of Kings,” and that always struck me as one of the most honest and up-front things any ruler or would-be ruler ever said. “We can dress it up prettier than this, but when it comes down to the unvarnished truth this is what it’s about: You’ll do as I say or I’ll send my goons to kill you.”
I thought about that for a long time. If there’s an ultimate argument, it seems only logical that there must be an ultimate answer. For years I thought the ultimate answer must be the bullets in my rifle, but it never seemed quite right. I’ve got bullets – he’s got frigging Cannon Balls. I mean, if there were three hundred million rifles throwing bullets at him, then maybe. But we all know that’s not going to happen. So if there’s an ultimate answer to his ultimate argument, it sure as hell ain’t bullets.
It finally came to me – and that’s when I abandoned the city and most of my stuff, and gave all that was behind me a good stiff Randian Shrug.
The ultimate answer to kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh.
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Author Archives: Joel
Hoi Polloi ain’t welcome, but Marie Antoinette would approve
This is a good one: Living Large in the White House The executive mansion is not in that much trouble, of course. It’s certainly not in sufficiently dire straits for Air Force One ($181,757 per hour) to be grounded, or … Continue reading
One of those days…
I don’t feel good. It’s a crappy day outside, and all I want to do is sit and read. But it’s shit-shoveling day, then I promised to work on geiger counters. So that’s what I’m going to do. Also, the … Continue reading
We will keep you safe, no matter how many of you we have to kill.
Now is the Time – The President’s Plan to Protect Our Children and Our Communities by Reducing Gun Violence (PDF) Just thumbing quickly through this 15-page brochure, so you don’t have to: Close loopholes… Require background checks… Report information… Share … Continue reading
Almost Spring!
Today’s supposed to be a replay of yesterday: Mostly sunny, mid-sixties temps, increasing afternoon wind. I’m taking the morning to do springtime chores: Laundry, straightening up the yard, strengthening the chicken yard and roofing it with landscape cloth. Stuff I … Continue reading
If I’m reading the calendar correctly,…
This is the day when Tam goes in for cancer surgery. We’re thinking about you, Oh Mistress of Snark.
Oh brave new world that has such people in it!
My god. New TSA rules on knives draw fire from 9/11 kin Hamilton Peterson, who lost his father and stepmother on Fight 93, said, “I have enormous respect for the great work of the TSA; however, I am concerned this … Continue reading
It’s like work, but in slow motion.
Gorgeously warm day: Partly sunny, temps in the mid-sixties. Time to move a whole bunch of rotted manure to the holes that will soon host Landlady’s new fruit trees. So I brought Gulchenshittenhaulen for Wednesday shit-shoveling. Loaded the bucket, drove … Continue reading
That whizzing sound that passed over your head and startled your massive protective detail, Mr. Obama? That was the irony.
I keep waiting for the entire Onion staff to just throw their hands up and go get real jobs… The White House announced Tuesday that it was canceling all public tours of the president’s home because of the sequester spending … Continue reading
I’m going to let somebody zap my eyes with a laser.
Next Thursday. It’s all set up. Call me old-fashioned, but this seems like a very strange thing to do.
But what is left for us to talk about?
Here’s an editorial piece from several weeks back that’s making the rounds this morning. Sorry: I followed the rabbit hole down and can’t quite recall where I first saw it referenced. Well, I want to be part of this debate … Continue reading
I’ve noticed something very disturbing.
Last week while I was in the big town getting my eyes examined I blew the budget on frivolity. At Wal-Mart there were these double-feature DVDs of the Harry Potter movies in the sale rack, and I bought one of … Continue reading
I accept this award in the name of, um, hermitty people everywhere!
Yeah, you can have the crisis-of-the-month-club news. I cheerfully give you my share if you want it. Over the past several years this has become the biggest, happiest morning of the year for me. This morning, for the first time … Continue reading
Is a nation still out there?
Kinda took yesterday off from the ‘pooter, to enjoy me a beautiful day. And yet, my conscience nags. With the horrid cut in the rate of the government’s essential growth due to be imposed upon us this past Friday, and … Continue reading
On muscle memory & misc.
Back in 2011, after that reactor melt-down in Japan, Geiger Counter Guy flooded the world with geiger counters. Since then the market has been utterly flat. But a couple of days ago he told me he wanted to work up … Continue reading
Wow. Could it be this is really gaining traction?
I am gobsmacked. In a good way. Wilson Combat Announces Anti-Gun States, No-Sale Policy Effective: February 28, 2013 Wilson Combat will no longer provide any products or services to any State Government imposing legislation that infringes on the second amendment … Continue reading
“Self defense is not an option”? That’s your choice, lady. Don’t try to impose it on me.
Here’s a news clip about “dozens” of people attending an “anti-violence” rally in some city somewhere – I wasn’t paying that much attention. Note the lady in the Obama hat… Readers will immediately recognize that “self defense is not an … Continue reading
Well! There’s a surprise.
I went to the ophthalmologist, and he didn’t pronounce any new eye ailments. He didn’t pronounce any old ones cured, either. And he didn’t seem surprised that eye drops aren’t getting it done, for the right eye that has the … Continue reading
Off to see the wizard.
Eye appointment this morning. Let’s see: First time it was glaucoma. Then it was glaucoma AND cataracts. Maybe this time they’ll give me plague?
Check out the Magpul on that one!
Via Jerking the Trigger, Magpul offers Colorado lawmakers a parting shot… Due to a bill currently moving through the Colorado legislature, there is the possibility that Colorado residents’ ability to purchase standard capacity magazines will soon be infringed. Before that … Continue reading









































