Author Archives: Joel

About Joel

You shouldn't ask these questions of a paranoid recluse, you know.

Unexpected birthday present!

Former Weekender Neighbor L washed my laundry today – beautiful day for running large appliances – and also remembered my birthday! Sausage and crackers and wine! So I know what I’m having for dinner. Laddie’s too young to help with … Continue reading

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I hate when this happens…

Last night while watching a movie I started idly cleaning out my desk drawer for the first time in…um… And anyway, quite to my surprise it contained not one but three rings of old keys… And do I have the … Continue reading

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Well, for heaven’s sake…

The weather has been very changeable, and when that happens my cell signal gets weird when it exists at all. I sent this picture to my laptop on walkie yesterday afternoon, after the rain stopped and the sky started to … Continue reading

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AOC saves the world!

Imagine all the people Forced at bayonet point to surrender their goods and service to the state You-HOO-hoo-hoo-hoo… You may say I’m a dreamer But I plan to control the guns I hope one day you’ll join us Then my … Continue reading

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“Nuke’em” Swalwell promises jail to all gun owners who will not submit

I can’t wait to vote for this guy… Swalwell: I Will Jail Those Who Defy My Gun Grabbing Agenda Even CNN hairspray-heads can’t take him seriously… TAPPER: So, gun control is the central plank in your campaign.You wrote last year … Continue reading

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It’s raining, it’s pouring…

…the old man wishes he was snoring… It started seriously raining about 9 last night. Evidence in the form of deep, Jeep-proceeds-sideways mud suggests that it continued to rain all night long. It’s 9:30 as I type this paragraph and … Continue reading

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The potion that solves this problem is in a box marked “Bounty.”

Mike in comments left a link to this story, which I note some of you have already read… ‘I don’t feel safe in my neighbourhood,’ says man suing Collingwood over coyotes People in Collingwood say coyotes have killed dogs and … Continue reading

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Laddie was right.

I knew he was right because there’s only one animal other than the occasional dog that leaves dog-like tracks like the ones that have been desecrating the wash end of my driveway lately. But a few days ago he took … Continue reading

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A diagnostic poster for cookie baking…

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If I may borrow Uncle’s question for a moment…

…why are gun control activists so violent? She ran on responsible gun regulation, now she’s accused of killing her campaign treasurer ATLANTA – A former Georgia Congressional candidate has been charged with murder after her former campaign treasurer was found … Continue reading

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So last week I solved a lifelong mystery…

I turn 65 years old this month, and ever since I was a little kid I have wondered – exactly what is a flour sifter for? I mean, sure, I get that it sifts flour. But why does flour require … Continue reading

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Getcher “Bernie is my Comrade” shirts before they’re outlawed!

Yup. Sanders Lawyers Do Not Like These “Bernie Is My Comrade” T-Shirts One Bit Claire Hawkins, a lawyer with Garvey, Schubert, Barer — which said it is “the official organization” of the [Sanders] campaign — sent the letter to Daniel … Continue reading

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Letting it rise too long…

I bake bread once or twice a week, more or less on autopilot, and gradually I slide into bad habits. Lately it seems I’ve been letting the dough rise too long. I get a nice rise, punch it down, divide … Continue reading

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Waiting for the flowers…

It might not happen this year, I don’t know. But there’s a sort of short barrel cactus, not real common around here, that occasionally grows the prettiest flower I’ve ever seen… The plants really blend in with their surroundings, so … Continue reading

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Thank you, Trump…

So many times in the past couple of years I’ve been tempted to come out and … not support, god knows, but defend Donald Trump in more than the most grudging terms. He has held up well, I think, under … Continue reading

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Been out all morning…

A beautiful day for once! After 3-4 days of cold/windy and then rain, it was nice to see the sun… The ladies are doing well. I’m happy to report that the new girls have finally discovered the joy and convenience … Continue reading

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Sorry, weather went all wonky…

…and my cell signal went away entirely, it seems. Didn’t have anything to talk about anyway. I just huddled inside, venturing out only for chicken chores and one run to D&L’s to take care of their horses while they were … Continue reading

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Never start an argument with someone who buys ink by the barrel.

Now that’s a take-down: Oh, and may the fleas of a thousand camels infest Ilhan Omar’s private parts.

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Back to bundling up…

Wow, yesterday and today the wind has been howling. Temps in the 40’s or – actually mid-fifties right now, which is good because this is the day D&L decided to top off their haybarn. I just got back, covered with … Continue reading

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Don’t it always seem to go…

…that you don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone. Heh – people tend to be “law-abiding” only to the point that suits them as individuals. Californians have had their magazine sizes limited by law for decades, and – don’t … Continue reading

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