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They say that Louis XIV had the inscription Ultima Ratio Regum cast into all the cannon of the French Army. It means “The Ultimate Argument of Kings,” and that always struck me as one of the most honest and up-front things any ruler or would-be ruler ever said. “We can dress it up prettier than this, but when it comes down to the unvarnished truth this is what it’s about: You’ll do as I say or I’ll send my goons to kill you.”
I thought about that for a long time. If there’s an ultimate argument, it seems only logical that there must be an ultimate answer. For years I thought the ultimate answer must be the bullets in my rifle, but it never seemed quite right. I’ve got bullets – he’s got frigging Cannon Balls. I mean, if there were three hundred million rifles throwing bullets at him, then maybe. But we all know that’s not going to happen. So if there’s an ultimate answer to his ultimate argument, it sure as hell ain’t bullets.
It finally came to me – and that’s when I abandoned the city and most of my stuff, and gave all that was behind me a good stiff Randian Shrug.
The ultimate answer to kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh.
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Author Archives: Joel
How a gate valve fails…
Back around the time I replaced it, I took this apart to see specifically what went wrong with it and its twin at the bottom of the slope beside the cabin. Turns out to be pretty simple. The gate is … Continue reading
Care packages! Canned meat edition…
Big Brother outdid himself… Look at all this canned meat! BB forewarned me that he was updating his own stash and sending me the stuff that was creeping up on its best-by dates, so this stuff has to go to … Continue reading
Hey guys, check this out…
Ian’s been promising/threatening something called Project Lightening, a series of videos in cooperation with C&Rsenal involving basically all the LMGs/automatic rifles of WWI. And by “involving” I mean “shooting them a lot while putting them through various trials.” The logistics … Continue reading
Parts passing in the night…
I’m hoping to see Landlady tomorrow or even this evening, depending on weather, bad weather being more likely to push the meeting forward since I’ll have to ferry her in from the county road. That means Care Package Day, which … Continue reading
Indoors day, mostly, but busy…
Sorry, I know I haven’t been posting a lot but the weather has been so changeable that connectivity has been a real problem. I have a lot of photos but they’re taking forever, so even as I type this I … Continue reading
Finally, worked up a pleasant sweat outdoors.
Beautiful day! Mid-fifties, nice sun, no wind to speak of. And that was exactly what the forecast predicted, so I was happy when Neighbor D called and said it was hay day. I had just been trying to plan some … Continue reading
Still nothing at the cattle waterer…
Not even birds. The only wildlife is that which we make for ourselves, I guess…
Today’s supposed to be prettier…
Getting off to a cold start, but only because it was clear all night… Less than an hour later it’s already 50o in here and climbing fast. I slept like a rock from eight to six-thirty and am feeling pretty … Continue reading
Get a load of this…
The clouds blew away around 9 but the wind persists and it’s still in the 20’s. The wind has been blowing the sand around for days, to where tire tracks only last a few hours. The new snow is cold … Continue reading
“Oh, for God’s sake…”
Woke at 5:30 not exactly ready to face the world. Went out with Torso Boy and the air was warmish and moist-smelling; there were no stars and the thermometer said 31o. I just took my leg off and went back … Continue reading
On the quality of Chinese camo netting from Amazon…
This one’s just about exactly a year old. And it didn’t survive the last couple of windstorms. It would probably be fine as shade cover for camping trips and such, or in a place with milder weather. But the UV … Continue reading
Calcium and Iron Oxide…
The water tank on top of the ridge is nearly full at last. This afternoon I’ll turn the pump off. And every morning for the past few days I’ve trudged up the slope to see how much the water level … Continue reading
Wow. Soccer is not for sissies.
My peals of laughter should not be taken as lack of sympathy, but are entirely to be blamed on the commentator.
Huh. I’m beginning to wonder about the water…
Was there anything wrong with it at all, before I started tinkering and breaking things? Because as far as I can tell, the tank is holding its level overnight. I’m beginning to think I just used more water in a … Continue reading
After such a string of mild mornings, this one kinda stings.
Laddie got me up at 4:30 with an urgent demand, then we both just climbed back into the sack until seven. It’s not that cold, 15o at present, but it certainly feels cold compared to the past mild week or … Continue reading
Had to break out the heavy coat for afternoon chores, from sure
Stayed in the mid-thirties all day which wouldn’t have been bad at all except for the 40mph+ wind. Went out to walk the dog in just a hoodie and came back frozen after only a circuit of the driveway. So … Continue reading
Winter returns to Joel’s Gulch
Heavy wind in the afternoon often means a change of weather, so I woke this morning to see our brief mild spell has gone. There’s a dusting of snow and the weather man (person of undefined gender?) says the temp … Continue reading
A second thought about Torso Boy’s intolerant morning…
I went to have a second look at that scat pile Laddie found this morning. And you know, it kinda looks like cat. We do have quite a few bobcats here, and on one occasion we even accidentally documented that … Continue reading
It took an embarrassingly long time to finish this…
…because I only get to town once a week and I didn’t get the right stuff the first time. Or…the second time… …but I finally finished repairing/replacing the valves at the foot of the water tank. Sunny and warmish, a … Continue reading
Laddie has a brush with the locals
One thing we’ve worked on since the day he arrived: First thing in the morning, as soon as I get my leg on, he obviously needs to go out and pee and I don’t want to have to futz with … Continue reading









































