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They say that Louis XIV had the inscription Ultima Ratio Regum cast into all the cannon of the French Army. It means “The Ultimate Argument of Kings,” and that always struck me as one of the most honest and up-front things any ruler or would-be ruler ever said. “We can dress it up prettier than this, but when it comes down to the unvarnished truth this is what it’s about: You’ll do as I say or I’ll send my goons to kill you.”
I thought about that for a long time. If there’s an ultimate argument, it seems only logical that there must be an ultimate answer. For years I thought the ultimate answer must be the bullets in my rifle, but it never seemed quite right. I’ve got bullets – he’s got frigging Cannon Balls. I mean, if there were three hundred million rifles throwing bullets at him, then maybe. But we all know that’s not going to happen. So if there’s an ultimate answer to his ultimate argument, it sure as hell ain’t bullets.
It finally came to me – and that’s when I abandoned the city and most of my stuff, and gave all that was behind me a good stiff Randian Shrug.
The ultimate answer to kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh.
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Author Archives: Joel
The good news is my wallet is lighter.
The bad news is the IOP is still way high, and the worse news is the ophthalmologist put me on different eyedrops that cost three times as much. But the other good news is at least I got two months’ … Continue reading
Yes, I enjoy paying large sums to have total strangers come real close and do invasive things to my eyeballs. You?
I’m off to the big town about 50 miles away for some eye tests. Later, if I can stay out of prison and find my way back, I’ll cheerfully discuss the way my need for regular eyeball examinations dovetails so … Continue reading
And I missed out. Dang
Ian and Karl declare Smockapalooza! Looks like the weatherman is thinking about being right, which means it’s to be overcast today and stormy tomorrow. Plus tomorrow I’m going to the big town about 50 miles away for some eye tests, … Continue reading
I did not know this.
The Merle Haggard thing got me going through some old and rather hated memories of ‘old-school’ country music. And through the wonder of Youtube, I learned something I had not known. I always thought Willie Nelson wrote Blue Eyes Crying … Continue reading
Aw, man.
I just read that Merle Haggard died. That guy was one of the few bright spots in a childhood spent surrounded by and really hating country music. Then not so long ago I saw this bit of weirdness with him … Continue reading
Don’t laugh, but… No, seriously. Don’t laugh.
I don’t remember from whence I followed the trail to this thing right here… Don’t laugh: I have a serious reason for raising my cats gender-neutral Gotta tell you, when I see a pullquote that says,… That’s when I decided … Continue reading
They used to call that slavery. Obama just called it Tuesday.
I’ve worked for bosses who wanted too much and gave too little. I got up and left. There’s a word for what you are when that’s no longer an option. As I recall, the word is not “citizen.” Obama criticizes … Continue reading
Seriously?
Smart Cookies: The Gendered Spaces of Labor, Citizenship, and Nationalism in the Girl Scout Cookie Sale Lauded as the largest girl-led financial literacy program, the annual Girl Scout cookie sale not only teaches girls important business and leadership skills but … Continue reading
The Anti-Gun Male
David Codrea reminds me of this classic from Jewish World Review: The Anti-Gun Male He often accuses men with guns of “compensating for something.” The truth is quite the reverse. After all, how is he supposed to feel knowing there … Continue reading
The very definition of scrounging…
Turning junk into something useful. Even if it’s only something to burn for heat. Whether it’s demolition salvage, pallets or just broken furniture, it’s still bound to be better firewood or kindling than juniper. At least as good, anyway. We … Continue reading
It’s dead, Jim.
And speaking of long-term tool reviews, it’s official… After thorough testing, I’m calling it. The Coleman spotlight’s battery will not hold a charge and the light is on its way to the dump next trip. Timing could be worse. Next … Continue reading
B&D cordless drill – long-term review
Hey, remember this? Yup, eleven months ago I acquired this B&D cordless drill, a gift from my older brother, just in time for the Great Siding Project of 2015. In that time it has been carried up and down many … Continue reading
Be afraid. Be very afraid.
Climate change threat to public health worse than polio, White House warns They said it, I believe it, that settles it. Climate change poses a serious danger to public health – worse than polio in some respects – and will … Continue reading
I dream of living in a place…
…where “the Internet is out” is actually a phrase. And it means that not a single card reader or ATM machine works. In the entire town. Which also means EBT cards don’t work. Which pretty much brings all commerce to … Continue reading
Monday morning trip to town…
…and I’ve already wasted enough time trying to come up with a Monday morning post. My brain, she ees dry, and now I gotta run. So something later, I kind of promise.
Third time’s the charm.
A second beautiful day in a row! Had brunch with Landlady and S&L, then wandered home to catch up on laundry. Water in the cistern is still a little cool but not painfully so, and by late morning it was … Continue reading
The Batbelt Conundrum
Seems like I go through this every damn Spring. “I feel like one of those idjits on the prepper forums who won’t shut up about his ‘EDC gear.’ And it’s kinda heavy. Couldn’t I pare this down a bit? Do … Continue reading
I know. I’m bad. I’m sorry. It’s sexist* and onesiephobic.
But I laughed loud and suddenly. Lifted from 90 Miles. — *Let’s face it, comparing that to a woman is an insult to women.
Just made it.
I’ve needed to bring a few wheelbarrows worth of firewood to Landlady’s house ever since the last time she was here, and the weather’s been so borderline crappy I kept putting it off. Can’t remember if she’s coming back this … Continue reading









































