Author Archives: Joel

Three hours till the biggest blast the neighborhood’s ever seen. Landlady is in full field general mode, and people are starting to trickle in from out of the region. So far my only direct participation was making twice the number … Continue reading →

I’ve got the patented Tam app to do that for me.

Got a call from GC Guy yesterday afternoon, and he wants me there today and Monday. A little warning would be nice. It’s gonna be a wild weekend anyway, as Landlady has a “farewell to the building inspector” party planned … Continue reading →

A long time from now, in a galaxy that’s right here, unto us a child will be born. And they will wrap her in swaddling clothes, and lay her in a manger, and they will name her Honor. Fast-forward about … Continue reading →

Beneath this generator is a rabbit – or some large rodent – having a very, very bad day. I suppose I should go resolve the issue before LB has a coronary, or digs so much he gets a generator on … Continue reading →

I picture Gerald Butler puttin’ on his Leonidas face and bellowing a spittle-laden “This! Isn’t! EAST GERMANY!” into the face of whoever’s responsible for this atrocious policy just before kicking him/them into a big frickin’ convenient well. Want another approach, … Continue reading →

Of course I’m pleased and thrilled – and shocked – that it all actually went together without a hitch. But what I’m especially happy about is that it doesn’t take up nearly as much of my limited floor space as … Continue reading →

Stewart’s a democrat, and even HE gets it. The only way Ron Paul is going to get air time is if he brings a submachine gun to a debate – and actually uses it on his opponents. er…notthatI’msuggestinganythingofthesort… There’s your … Continue reading →

Got a call from my neighbor D, wanting to know if I’m ready to hang the Lair’s kitchen cabinets. Fact is I’ve been ready for a couple of days, but I have had a problem. I’ve developed – Yes! Yet … Continue reading →

It’s been a good summer for the mice. Which is to say, of course, it’s been a bad summer for people who don’t especially appreciate the virtues of mice. Click has taken this opportunity to go on some sort of … Continue reading →

This song didn’t mean anything much to me in the ‘sixties. Many years later, after fifteen or so years of marriage when we didn’t really have a thing left in common but before we started admitting it, it got a … Continue reading →

Okay, we all know about the child-groping and the grandma-stripping. But take away the Hands of Blue and TSA goons probably get a lot less creepy, right? I mean, there are non-theater-related things you can do to make airline flight … Continue reading →

“Can you believe they didn’t have a Jerry Reed CD in the whole god***n store? Well, for 15 shining minutes last Friday night, they did.” – Reginald Spears [Ed Note: This story is almost certainly not true. But it should … Continue reading →

The government starts making its cops look like extras in a George Lucas flick… (No, I gather they’re not British. British government never shows this much style.)

Ghost has taken personal charge of that pesky squirrel-in-the-pantry situation. Unfortunately, while Ghost has the size and the speed and theoretically the intelligence to deal with something so plebeian as a squirrel without the slightest problem, he just doesn’t seem … Continue reading →

Doing a quick catch-up on what’s happening with the world before I head on down to the Lair. A movement flickers in the left corner of my eye and I turn just in time to see something tiny and gray-brown … Continue reading →

This might be a good time to remind everyone that approximately 233 people re-boarded that plane with assault rifles, pistols, and machine guns–but nothing that could have been used as a weapon. – Ian Bertram