Author Archives: Joel

About Joel

You shouldn't ask these questions of a paranoid recluse, you know.

The thing about generators…

…is that when you need one, you need it right f***ing NOW. But when you don’t need one, you don’t give it any thought at all. Which greatly increases the likelihood that it won’t be ready to use when you … Continue reading

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Okay, this is just funny as hell.

Check this out. No comment from me is necessary to make this funny. Just watch the damned thing, all right? What are you still doing here? (Caution: NSFW due to bad language.) H/T to Bill St. Clair

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Get a load of this.

Wonder why you haven’t heard much from the Brady Bunch lately? Wonder why those breast-beating ninnies haven’t been pissing in your Cheerios while gun rights activists have been cleaning up their mess in one state legislature after another? Where’d they … Continue reading

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In which I offend my two remaining Conservative readers…

I’m reading this morning from Jim Bovard’s blog, following a conversation with a friend who’s a big Bovard fan. He wrote an essay that got published in The Christian Science Monitor a couple of weeks ago, to a lot of … Continue reading

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It’s not the song in my head…

…It’s just a really cool song. I have Tam to thank for it. She mentioned Beethoven’s ninth, I went looking for a decent copy of Ode To Joy, and it just went from there. Though this one ends kind of … Continue reading

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No comment…

I just think this is really funny. A Transportation Security Administration screener is facing an assault rap after he allegedly beat a co-worker who joked about the size of the man’s genitalia after he walked through a security scanner. Hm. … Continue reading

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She put a dead mouse in my pants.

See, I’m guessing most people don’t have these problems. Shake out your boots, sure: That’s just common sense. There’s no telling what stinging creepy-crawlies might find their way into your boots overnight. But your pants? That’s just wrong. Note to … Continue reading

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And speaking of Lieberman…

I’ve just learned, via Tam, that May is Zombie Awareness Month. Do you know where your zombies are?

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“You’re a citizen if we say you are…”

“And if we say you aren’t, we don’ need no steeking Constitution…” There are two things about this bill I suggest people get shocked and terrified by:1. Terrorist Expatriation Act – TEA. Tea. Get it? Get it? Aw, c’mon. You … Continue reading

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The best irony is the kind you don’t know you’ve committed.

Hundreds expected for ‘Million Mom March’

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What IS private anymore?

Let’s say I’m a bookseller. I’ve got an interest in knowing what books sell best, and that information is easy enough to collect from my own records. But let’s say I want to go farther than that; I need more … Continue reading

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On the disadvantages of live-breeding horses…

Well, my neighbors finally got all their horses back in one place. Which makes more work for me, which is good because more work pays more. It seems they decided to celebrate Unification Day by breeding Paulo, the Stallion from … Continue reading

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I went to…a place…

And I did…a thing. And that’s more than you need to know. In the place of this line there was once a long, amusing paragraph. You’d have loved it, but my lawyers insisted that it come down. In light of … Continue reading

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Tell me again how EXTREME it is…

…not to trust your government? Because I gotta tell you, this thing is EXTREMELY creeping me out. Y’know, if somebody owed me $4K and I sent him a message like this, I’ve a feeling he’d have at least a civil … Continue reading

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When I become a terrorist…

I’m gonna have to get me one of those Facebook Page thingies. Because that’s apparently a requirement.

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I won’t believe it till I read it on Alex Jones.

And yes I know it’s probably already there. I’m not going to look. According to this vitally important report you’re not allowed to see unless you pay for it, summarized here, we’re all DOOMED! DOOMED, I SAY! …experts forecast if … Continue reading

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That faint odor in the background…

…is the scent of the Feds’ case against the Hutaree as it starts to decompose. If half of what the feds claim about the Hutaree is true, they are absolutely and squarely within the demographic our masters like to call … Continue reading

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Hm.

My prospects for a booming career in the manual labor field are fading fast, if the fallout from the past two weeks is any indication. Week before last I spent feverishly trying to finish a (rather small, I admit) concrete … Continue reading

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Yeah, okay. I got nothing.

This day has been so void of activity that it even included an afternoon nap. There is nothing going in my life today, either inside my head or without. I can’t even think of anything snarky to say about not … Continue reading

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Oh, for heaven’s sake…

Well, it could certainly have come at a worse time. We had a little snow during the eight-day build party, but only a little and it melted right away. We had one windy night and day, but no damage. All … Continue reading

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