But wait! There’s more! This isn’t just any shovel, you mall ninjas. This is the tacticalest shovel in the entire physical universe.
Includes Over 12 tools & carry bag:
Phillips & Flat-head Screwdriver
Ferrocerium Rod (Fire Starter)
Hex Bolt Wrenches
Rechargeable Tactical Light & Mount
First Aid Kit
It actually comes with a mountable flashlight. A tactical one. I didn’t look to see where they stuck the whistle and the compass.
This is…seriously the greatest thing ever. I recommend that everyone who ever slapped down $12 for a concealed carry permit badge purchase at least two of these immediately. Two is one! Because one is none, and that’s tactical.
ETA: I just went back to the linked site (Yeah. I’m bored. It’s raining.) and found that I hadn’t given this shovel nearly enough credit for tacticalness. I should be sued by its marketers for not pointing out that the handle is not only hollow, but also comes apart in 3! Yes, 3! Pieces, for extra super-tactical fragility!