Avalon: He’s doing it again! Three times a week like clockwork, and all he ever does is say hello and take all my manure. He could at least ask. And have you ever seen such an obsession? I agree my manure is very fine indeed, but there are other things in life.
Comet: It’s so sad to watch. I’ve offered to share my alfalfa with him. Every time he comes over while I’m eating, I throw some on the ground for him to share. You’ve seen it. And he never joins me in so much as a mouthful. Just starts in forking up manure like he can’t get enough. The hangovers must be awesome.
Avalon: Well, you can’t say I haven’t tried. Several times today alone I’ve stood in his path, trying to intervene. But will he stop? The way he waves his arms at me and shouts! So rude! I suppose you must simply let some people go until they’ve hit bottom. But a manure fixation? Please.
Comet: It is kinda kinky. Perhaps a good gelding would help?
Avalon: (snicker) It did wonders for you, you bad boy.
Oh, that’s funny. Yes, I’ve imagined all sorts of interesting conversations among my animals. The goats were so funny… they’d be like a bunch of old ladies sitting around gossiping.
And dogs, of course. 🙂
Probably don’t want to know what cats talk about. Most likely involves plans to seize control of the universe.
Cats have detailed plans for that takeover… have had for centuries. All they need to carry them out is THUMBS. LOL
What keeps us safe from our new feline overlords is not the thumb thing, though I suppose that would increase the challenge, so much as that each individual cat has plans for universal domination – at the expense of every other cat. If they could work together we’d be in trouble, but no one cat can pull it off.
This is undoubtedly also true. I suspect the same for most government controllers. They each want dominion, one way or another. If they ever stopped fighting and stabbing each other in the back… well, the result would be cat-astrophic. OOOh, I love puns. 🙂
How on earth do you think cats ARENT in control of the universe?
We feed them, protect them, clean up after them…
scratch them, keep them warm, and care for them in their age. All they are plotting at this point, is how to replace us with machines, that are less needy…
THAT is the real reason they need thumbs. Screwdrivers are a b1@tch to use without them when it comes time for maintenance.
, , , plus the fact that they still can’t operate a can opener.
😉