Surprising how many of these rules I take seriously…as actual life rules.

Found this somewhere and copied it on an impulse. It’s clearly supposed to be one of those “rules for real men” lists, yet quite a few have actually become hard rules around here without my really planning it that way. Some, of course, have done the other thing…

1. Love God.
2. Always have a knife.
3. Don’t put your hands on anyone, require the same from everyone else.
4. Don’t allow yourself to be wronged or insulted.
5. Everyone lies.
6. Watch the hands, hands kill.
7. If it’s not yours don’t take it.
8. Pockets are to be used to assist you in life.
9. All guns are loaded.
10. It is better to seek forgiveness than ask permission.
11. Keep your word.
12. Keep an eye on the door.
13. Have a plan.
14. Never apologize if you aren’t wrong or for doing the job right.
15. Don’t mess with the coffee.
16. It is better to be hated for who you are than loved for who you are not.
17. Have a second plan
18. Have a way to make fire.
19. Never bother a Holyman unnecessarily.
20. Don’t bother the driver, he is driving.
21. If you aren’t willing to lead, don’t bitch about being led.
22. Cigars are acceptable. Cigarettes are not.
23. Make love to your wife at least once a week. A loved wife is a happy wife.
24. Work.
25. Make it home.

Below the fold, my reply.

1. Your mileage may vary, but I’m personally indifferent to this one. I find no evidence that a personal god even exists, let alone that he cares what I think of him. But I’ve been wrong before.

2. The moment you don’t, you’ll want one.

3. Well, that’s just being polite.

4. It does not pay to be a weakling. It especially does not pay to be perceived as a weakling. This is not just for the boonies. It holds even more true when you’re growing up a skinny white boy in Detroit.

5. At a minimum, everybody overpromises.

6. This rule does not apply to animals, which can also kill you.

7. This is actually a very beneficial rule.

8. Also, the sky is blue. Yet if I poured out my pocket contents before you right this minute, you’d find only things I use every single day to assist me in life, so yes.

9. Internalized this one when I was still just a kid.

10. This is one of those koans a young man would do well to study and experiment with. Seriously. Had I done so I might have lived a happier life.

11. Yes.

12. Absolutely.

13. Even a bad plan is better etc. It’s more of a way to get you moving, and should not be set in stone.

14. Ties in with #4.

15. Well, duh.

16. I guess this means ‘don’t be a phony,’ which is pretty good advice except when it’s not. Excessive openness can also be a vice, in my opinion. See #4. But then I’m neurotic.

17. Plan B is when things start getting done, in my experience.

18. This is one of those rules I have learned to never break. By which I do not mean all those dumb improvised ‘fire-starters’ the wannabes on the survivalist fora are always on about. But I am at this moment within arm’s reach of at least four Bic lighters, one of which is in my pocket and which I have already used twice today, and it’s just a little after six, and I don’t smoke.

19. There’s no point in finding out you were wrong about #1 the hard way.

20. Sometimes the driver wants to be bothered.

21. This rule only applies to job sites. Anyone pushing it as a life lesson should be killed immediately.

22. I don’t know why this one is here. Do whatever you want.

23. If this rule has worked well for you, you have nothing but my goodwill. I’m not bitter at all. Really.

24. When it’s appropriate, by all means.

25. This should actually be rule #1 with the caveat: “Someday you may meet something for which it’s worth not making it home. Be ready for that.”