Cruiser’s pen is right next to the one that holds Avalon, H’s favorite saddle mare. Avalon is a sweet girl but a little excitable – when another horse screws with her, instead of going off somewhere else she stands there and gets mad. Cruise Control is a miniature gelding with the attitude of an imp, and he seems to take absolute delight in getting a rise out of Avalon. He’ll reach through the bars to nip her flank, and instead of moving three inches away and sneering she stays put and throws a big fit. Lately this happens pretty much every time I have to clean their pens, so I can’t say I appreciate it. Avalon does not always accurately identify friend from foe, and you don’t want to be in there with her when she’s being an idiot.

Truth is, after two days of rain I really didn’t want to be in there with her at all. If there were an Olympic event in mass shitting, Avalon would be the betting man’s favorite and today it was nicely mixed with thick mud. Makes me wish I could wear mucking boots: Today I could have used them.


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They say that Louis XIV had the inscription Ultima Ratio Regum cast into all the cannon of the French Army. It means “The Ultimate Argument of Kings,” and that always struck me as one of the most honest and up-front things any ruler or would-be ruler ever said. “We can dress it up prettier than this, but when it comes down to the unvarnished truth this is what it’s about: You’ll do as I say or I’ll send my goons to kill you.”
I thought about that for a long time. If there’s an ultimate argument, it seems only logical that there must be an ultimate answer. For years I thought the ultimate answer must be the bullets in my rifle, but it never seemed quite right. I’ve got bullets – he’s got frigging Cannon Balls. I mean, if there were three hundred million rifles throwing bullets at him, then maybe. But we all know that’s not going to happen. So if there’s an ultimate answer to his ultimate argument, it sure as hell ain’t bullets.
It finally came to me – and that’s when I abandoned the city and most of my stuff, and gave all that was behind me a good stiff Randian Shrug.
The ultimate answer to kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh.
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Can’t imagine why anyone wants a miniature horse myself, but that one would go to the auction or to a BBQ if it were mine to decide. sigh And Alvalon sounds as if she needs a LOT more work. Mares often get pissy if they just stand around. Mine sure did.
I can think of several things that would help. A much larger pen for Avalon would be at the top of the list. Spread the muck out more and it wouldnt’ be so wet, maybe. Having the pen on an incline would help too.
I’ve mucked enough muddy, shitty corrals to have a great deal of sympathy, my friend. But it’s job security at least. Maybe we need to do a crowdsource for some muck boots!
No, I’ve got access to mucking boots. They’re not expensive, plus I think there’s an unused pair in Landlady’s barn. But I can’t wear them. Boots without laces really need two working ankles.
Also, I kinda like Cruiser. He can be a little shit, but he’s really very friendly – though I concede I don’t get the point of having him around. H went through a pony cart phase but it really didn’t last long and now he rarely gets out, so he seeks his amusement elsewhere.
L L Bean has two models of 10″ lace up waterproof boots with and without insulation, if they are tall enough for what you do. Comfortable, durable to the max, will last several lifetimes, you can will them to someone who has the same size feet you do. Or do you have to try things on to be sure they will work for you?
Seems like MamaLiberty has a good idea about making the pen much larger to spread the shit out and give the horse something to do and somewhere to go. Is that possible? and donations for boots.
I see… never had any muck boots, so wasn’t aware they were the slip on kind. I can see where that would’t work. 🙂 As for the pony horse, whatever. I don’t see much point in keeping animals that don’t serve a real purpose, but that’s just me. Long as I don’t have to pay the feed bill… LOL
And Zelda, I had horses and lots of other livestock. The biggest headache with the upkeep was not having large enough pens and pasture. Kept the numbers down seriously because the shit shoveling so easily got away from me. So, I clearly remember that the job was easiest in the largest pen with a good slope. The feeders were at the high end, and the horses and cattle seemed to prefer to make their deposits at the low end… but the land sloped even more beyond that point so water never stood in it. Now, this was in a desert as well, so most of the time it was very dry indeed. But like they say:
It never rains in So. California, except when it does… it pours.
I have a friend who owns a couple miniature horses who will swear that she knows of instances where they’ve been used as service animals – visiting hospitals and such to give the patients some interesting distraction. She’ll also swear that that’s what she’s training hers for – it’s been a few years… I wonder how that’s going – in Winnemucca, BFE!
I reminded her of a booking we used to occasionally see at western-themed cookouts and banquets – Frosty the Bull. (hah – figures – he’s even got a webpage!) Frosty came with his own dribble bucket for carpeted venues! If his tail would start to twitch and he’d settle his hips – his handlers would be reaching for larger buckets! We used to wonder what they gave that animal – he was the most amiable and quiet bull I’ve ever been in a room with.
My friend said something about making some diaper-type affair for her horses. Can’t recall much she said after that – I was laughing too hard.
Interestingly enough – I first saw Frosty around 20 years ago. I suspect the current one is a newer iteration.
Cruise Control has been dyed green and dressed up as a unicorn and Santa Claus, and those are only the three incidents I know of. A horse with any self-respect would have trampled H long ago. He just likes the attention.