…but when it comes to auto maintenance, I’m the dead worst.
I busted my knuckles on flat rate in the ’70’s and ’80’s and hated every microsecond of it. Seriously, Sunday nights I used to get mean. Thank the gods of grease and iron that I have a way with words and can type. Those were two traits rarely found in back-shop wrenches in the pre-internet age, and they got me out of the shop before I just crawled into a hole and gave a blowjob to an 1911.
Anyway, that’s my excuse and I’m sticking to it: I’ll commit practically any act of denial before facing the fact that it’s time to crawl under the Jeep and fix something. Last month it was the front brakes, and thanks to kind TUAK readers I had the money to pay somebody else to do it*. But this time there was no excuse not to do it myself, because a)the part cost a heartbreaking sum, and b) it’s two frickin’ bolts and some electrical connections. C’mon, Joel.
When the starter began cranking slow, first I threw a battery at it. It made a surface kind of sense: The Jeep rarely goes as much as two miles at a time and always slowly: it almost may as well not have an alternator, so it goes through batteries. But as soon as I replaced the battery last month I knew it had been a mistake. Starter still cranked slow, and I noticed then what I missed before, which was that the starter was the only thing having electrical problems: Everything else worked just fine even when the starter refused to crank. Clearly not the battery. My shop foreman would have docked my pay.
Some problems come on you so gradually you don’t even notice. When I swapped out the starters the difference was so dramatic I started the engine several times just for the fun of listening to it. Now I’ll get over my reluctance to drive the Jeep for fear of getting stranded in somebody else’s yard.
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*And I still can’t say that without a splotch of shame, isn’t that weird? I could have saved $80 by doing it myself, but I just didn’t want to. How self-indulgent.
Having done things like a transmission remove/reinstall in an open yard during a blizzard because I had no alternative, I can relate to your “let somebody else do it” attitude. No foul there, sez me.
Hey Joel,
There is nothing to be ashamed about, you are simply reallocating the meager time resources that you have available to you. ;^)
Kidding aside I understand where you are coming from. There are a lot of things that I could do regarding maintenance to my vehicles that I don’t with the exception of daily checks. Back in the day I did a lot and all without the aid of being inside a garage. Well I still don’t have a garage so off to the shop for oil changes and the like. I’m just too old for crawling under a car that is jacked up in a driveway where it could fall upon me. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.
May I join your support group? 🙂
Not two weeks ago I had the old van loaded with shooting junk for a nearby gun show. Half-way, I blew a tire in the night time. I pulled into a convenience store lot and — in zero degrees over packed snow — began the change. The doughnut bracket would not releae the spare. After ten minutes I gave up, caught a ride home with a good Samaritan, got the truck and reloaded the trade goods. Next morning, on the way to the show, I arranged with a tire shop to replace the tire — including a $50 service call. I can make a lot of excuses, but in the end it shames me to have paid another to CHANGE A FRICKEN TIRE. But under identical circumstances, I suppose I’d do it again. Maybe I’m becoming an urban liberal.
I can assign no blame or chide even having been accused of being ASE and Chrysler master certified at one time. I didn’t hate the work, though, I hated the dealership politics and stupid customers.
Remember that really awesome blue diesel Suburban with the “leave me alone or I’ll push your dammed house down” bumpers? Sit’s idle, lo these last few years. A fuel leak in an inconvenient location docks me in the driveway.
Note I said inconvenient, not impossible. I just find it preferable to make excuses rather than make repairs. The latest excuse was a bypass…..that was a year ago and I’m now running out of lame excuses.
Can’t blame you from my end. It’s a function of getting old, or so Evelyn says.
If I was in the area I would have volunteered to do your brakes for you, but I’m paying a shop to do simple exhaust work on my commuter car today.