Blow, evening breeze. Blow.
On days like this I’m tempted to feel bad about adopting him. Then I remember he was born in Phoenix – so it was more in the way of a rescue.
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They say that Louis XIV had the inscription Ultima Ratio Regum cast into all the cannon of the French Army. It means “The Ultimate Argument of Kings,” and that always struck me as one of the most honest and up-front things any ruler or would-be ruler ever said. “We can dress it up prettier than this, but when it comes down to the unvarnished truth this is what it’s about: You’ll do as I say or I’ll send my goons to kill you.”
I thought about that for a long time. If there’s an ultimate argument, it seems only logical that there must be an ultimate answer. For years I thought the ultimate answer must be the bullets in my rifle, but it never seemed quite right. I’ve got bullets – he’s got frigging Cannon Balls. I mean, if there were three hundred million rifles throwing bullets at him, then maybe. But we all know that’s not going to happen. So if there’s an ultimate answer to his ultimate argument, it sure as hell ain’t bullets.
It finally came to me – and that’s when I abandoned the city and most of my stuff, and gave all that was behind me a good stiff Randian Shrug.
The ultimate answer to kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh.
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Any thoughts about acquiring clippers and removing all that hair during the summer, or having a groomer do it?
It’s been discussed and has never really been dismissed. I don’t have the wherewithal to get him to a groomer (and probably not to pay one) and he would not at this late date start letting me near him with clippers*. There have been times when he barely tolerated the brush, though he’s been better about it this year.
Then again, the hair might do more good than harm. At least he doesn’t need to worry about sunburn.
ETA: I wouldn’t leave him alone with a groomer, either, lest I get word from that person’s hospital bed that I’m being sued big time. But with me controlling the end with teeth we might get through it. I once thought he’d be all right alone with an X-ray technician because she was a cute and petite woman, which he always approves of. That…didn’t go so well.
The noise of clippers is what dogs hate so we use hand clippers which are cheap and feel more like you are brushing him. After a couple of times he’ll soon twig that you doing it results in a much cooler dog.
My parents had a long haired black dog that Mom had clipped down every summer. He’d hide for about 2 weeks, embarrassed to be seen naked I presume. Maybe you could get LB a kiddy pool for the yard and let him spend the summer cooling it in the water. That would of course present the problem of a wet dog in the house or a muddy dog if he rolled in the dirt to dry off. Oh well, he’s survived summers before.