Author Archives: Joel

About Joel

You shouldn't ask these questions of a paranoid recluse, you know.

You know what I can’t watch?

I can’t watch those home-made videos of people getting hassled by cops. They’re like kiddy porn to me: I can’t bring myself to click on the link. Something about them just makes me terribly uncomfortable, and I can no longer … Continue reading

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Helpful Hints from the Hermit

Actually it was Landlady who clued me in to this. One kitchen gadget I always wanted but never thought about getting when I actually had opportunity was a rolling pin. I think about rolling pins every time I need to, … Continue reading

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Yow, Mas is not feeling the love!

In a recent BHM column, well-known gun writer and never-lets-us-forget-it former cop Massad Ayoob opined on last year’s dramatic uptick in police deaths: It is a horrible year for police line of duty deaths. This past weekend alone, at least … Continue reading

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If anybody finds a pair of raggedy green cargo pants…

…I think they’re mine. Wind started coming up yesterday evening. Not bad, nothing to worry about. Woke this morning to a mega-windstorm. Suddenly remembered I had five pairs of pants on the line behind the barn. Went to get them: … Continue reading

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If you threaten my life and kill my dog…and I don’t give you free food…is that a “human rights violation?”

Because Jimmuh Carter says it is. Seriously. So here’s the deal, as seen from my cave in the high desert. There’s this country called South Korea. It’s run by the usual bunch of statist kleptocrats – kinda like here, but … Continue reading

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In This Spot…

Is the post where I say everything I have to say about the Royal Wedding.

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Why are you so frightened of us?

I can’t remember how this got in my tabs or I’d hat-tip the link. But heres a former cop instructor with a column in a cop-oriented website, offering tips on how to deal with concealed-carrying “citizens.” Most of the article … Continue reading

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The stuff you do…

Woke up this morning and it was well below freezing for the first time in a couple of weeks. Naturally GC Guy called and asked me to come over to make a tray of geiger counters, finishing off our supply … Continue reading

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Strangling kittens on the off-chance that they too might be terrorists

Yes, of course – unlike Stewart – I object to the feds giving money away. I suspect that if I did even a modicum of research I’d learn that “first responders” have health care plans that would make the “royal … Continue reading

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Solari had her foal, but…

…as with so many things involving Solari the World’s Most Nervous Mare, it didnt go well. Not entirely her fault. She had a rupture, the baby tried to come out through her ass, and while H got him straightened out … Continue reading

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Just because what you’re doing isn’t illegal doesn’t mean other people are gonna put up with you.

Westboro Baptist Church goes to Mississippi – and loses. Most of the morons never made it out of their hotel parking lot. It seems that certain Rankin county pickup trucks were parked directly behind any car that had Kansas plates … Continue reading

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It’s a tank rack! It’s a storage shed! It’s a target stand!

I don’t know where they came from, but here on the property there are two big fuel tank racks. Probably seemed like the sort of thing that ought to come in handy someday. Four or five years ago M covered … Continue reading

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I emerged squalling from the nether regions of a human female. She seemed upset at the time.

“…the circumstances of your birth”? What does that even mean? “…Form DS-5513 asks for all addresses since birth; lifetime employment history including employers’ and supervisors names, addresses, and telephone numbers; personal details of all siblings; mother’s address one year prior … Continue reading

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Small, familiar damage alarms…

…started going off the moment I put on my leg and started hobbling around this morning. It’s been a busy weekend. I’m gonna be lame for the next couple of days, no way around that. We planted three apple trees … Continue reading

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When the cops do it, that means it isn’t illegal.

Or does it? Only the “legal” system knows for sure. Or not. Coming To a Patrol Car Near You! Without an arrest, search requires probable cause—the officer must have some reasonable basis for believing that a crime has been committed, … Continue reading

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And this is why the government needs a monopoly on force.

And authority to arbitrarily decide what’s right and wrong, and who gets busted for being wrong. Just because something is wildly popular doesn’t necessarily mean it is victimless. And just because criminal conduct doesn’t affect everyone doesn’t mean it affects … Continue reading

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I work harder for other people than I do for myself.

It’s true. Left to my own devices I’m comically lazy. Can’t get a damned thing done. Put me with somebody else, and I always end up tired. And dehydrated. And a bit sunburned. Hey! My first sunburn of the year! … Continue reading

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One of these days, Alice…

After I’ve betrayed the revolution and become president-for-life, I’m coming after everybody who ever uttered a declarative sentence involving the phrase “no expectation of privacy.” They’re goin’ to the wall. I know, it’s simplistic and possibly even brutal. But anybody … Continue reading

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This isn’t the railgun you’re looking for…

…but it’s cute. Ever so well packaged, and it’ll be my very first choice if a bunch of toy planes and old cell phones take me on one by one. Widely spaced. Not because it’s the best choice, just ’cause … Continue reading

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Had a bit of excitement this morning…

…or at least the boys did. Ghost’s got a few different “trespasser” modes. When he stands and barks, he’s just telling the world – and maybe a few passing scent molecules – who owns his ridge. When he barks and … Continue reading

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