Problem! There are too many unemployed Americans, and America doesn’t pump enough oil to satisfy its own needs.
Solution! Hire more people to pump more oil.
Problem! There’s a Snail Darter/Spotted Owl common lizard in the way.
Solution! Stomp, shovel, shut up Stack large numbers of government bureaucrats on the fringes of the oil fields*. Lizards will flock to the resulting clouds of flies. They will then eat and breed happily on their enhanced habitat. Everybody’s happy.
Less attractive Violent Solution: Use piles of actual horseshit, rather than the kind emitted by bureaucrats.
*I don’t know if Sand Dune Lizards are an endangered species, but government bureaucrats are definitely not.

















































I suggest we begin with the ‘crats who wanted to list prairie dogs as endangered.