Author Archives: Joel

About Joel

You shouldn't ask these questions of a paranoid recluse, you know.

I roll my eyes in the weather’s general direction…

You know that devastating winter storm that was going to kill us all like unto doomed extras in a preachy global warming movie? Yeah, apparently it wasn’t important after all. I guess the weather just decided, “Oh. Well, if I … Continue reading

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Oh, I hate to spend money…

…but I love topping off my bottles. So today, having settled the pressing matter of how much it would cost to get the Jeep out of hock, I topped off propane and Jeep fuel and bourbon as well as drinking … Continue reading

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How not to design a cabin for winter

The front of the Secret Lair peaks at 14′, which in addition to making for a mighty peculiar-looking structure in a 12×16 cabin can also make heating the thing in the morning a gradual matter. There were reasons for doing … Continue reading

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Private to Landlady…

Freezing rain with a light coating of snow. Everything’s covered with ice. You made the right call.

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“Wow, little dude. Excellent timing.”

One adjective almost never used around here in any sentence involving the words weather and timing is “excellent.” But Torso Boy and I got up at quarter to four this morning to go out and pee. It was overcast and … Continue reading

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Landlady’s visits, during which the weather always just sort of rolls the dice…

This time it jumped the gun a bit. It’s been kind of a weird November anyway, colder than usual, but I’ve enjoyed a few really nice days right here at the end. Coolish, but sunny and not stormy at all. … Continue reading

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Thank you, Mr. Obama, for the boom in gun sales during your administration.

I see now that that was your actual policy, and was not due to your ineptitude in trying to get them banned instead. Ditto oil production, I suppose… (TL:dr version – Obama on increased American oil production: “That was me.” … Continue reading

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Prepper pro-tip: freezing in the dark is not restful.

In fact it turns the minutes to hours. Picture this: It’s 3am and you’re awake because who could sleep? You’re shivering cold in a space you can’t effectively heat, in darkness you can’t comfortingly light. Prepare for a long, memorable … Continue reading

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I really am a bad person. I shouldn’t find this funny but I do.

I really do. 😀 At this rate I’ll never get into SJW heaven.

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Things don’t stay the same in the wash…

This morning while looking for something else I came upon an old photograph… That big square post just behind Ghost is the end of a fence, and just on the other side of that is the start of the path … Continue reading

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I often ask myself…

…just how hungry I’d need to be to take that shot. I’m from a part of Michigan and of a class where even urban people commonly sally forth annually to try and slay the vicious Whitetail. Killing deer is not … Continue reading

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Le Petit Pomme Conspiration

Okay, I’ve been using a second-hand iPhone for over a year, courtesy of Landlady. And recently I replaced the Official TUAK Laptop with a refurbished MacBook, courtesy of Big Brother, of course using the iPhone for connection. And I asked … Continue reading

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Why did the salmon cross the road?

Damned if I know… 😀 I’d be so tempted to be out there with a basket, playing Mama Bear…

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If I don’t give a damn about the new Mars robot, does it make me a bad person?

So for the past week or more I’ve been instructed over and over to feign deep concern over the new Mars robot and NASA’s supposed “seven minutes of terror,” or whatever. Don’t hate me if I got that wrong. I … Continue reading

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Laddie in the shortcut channel

This is the shortcut channel the water has cut in the horseshoe turn of the wash. The main part of the wash is at least 150 yards wide at this point, just beyond that bank behind the dog. But here … Continue reading

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The Jeep is back home…

I didn’t expect it to take half the damned day, but I did get it back at last… In hopes that things would go well I poured my last five gallons of fuel into D&L’s red Jeep, then brought two … Continue reading

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You know the mulies are getting too bold for their own good…

…when you actually run into a bunch of them while out walking. Sure, it happens in the Jeep but they’re not especially afraid of cars and cars cover a lot of ground more quickly than they seem able to process … Continue reading

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Battery Corrosion at Landlady’s Powershed

It’s a little early in the month for Battery Day, but yesterday afternoon was beautiful and not very cold so I decided to stop putting off fixing what looked like a looming problem with Landlady’s batteries. Even with ALL NEW … Continue reading

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Heat-powered woodstove fan: Review

Fans are like bacon: Almost anything can be improved by adding a fan to it. But my early days off grid were in an environment where any appliance whose power draw was measured in amps was immediately suspect unless proven … Continue reading

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Constitutional rights are bad when granted to bad people.

Says the State of New York… Democratic lawmakers in New York state are pushing a bill that would require gun purchasers to turn over to the state their social-media profiles and search histories. According to a report by WKBW, the … Continue reading

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