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They say that Louis XIV had the inscription Ultima Ratio Regum cast into all the cannon of the French Army. It means "The Ultimate Argument of Kings," and that always struck me as one of the most honest and up-front things any ruler or would-be ruler ever said. "We can dress it up prettier than this, but when it comes down to the unvarnished truth this is what it's about: You'll do as I say or I'll send my goons to kill you."
I thought about that for a long time. If there's an ultimate argument, it seems only logical that there must be an ultimate answer. For years I thought the ultimate answer must be the bullets in my rifle, but it never seemed quite right. I've got bullets - he's got frigging Cannon Balls. I mean, if there were three hundred million rifles throwing bullets at him, then maybe. But we all know that's not going to happen. So if there's an ultimate answer to his ultimate argument, it sure as hell ain't bullets.
It finally came to me - and that's when I left the city, abandoned a goodly percentage of my goods, and gave all that was behind me a good, stiff Randian Shrug.
The ultimate answer to kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh.
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Author Archives: Joel
Seriously. I found this email in my box this morning… Yeah, I bought a bunch of stump socks over several months last year and now they won’t leave me alone. I’m glad they’re there – for over 40 years I … Continue reading
Last Monday the dollar store was completely out of it.
Not unexpected – it was a quite wet winter by our standards, and soon there should be grass. Unlike last year, when the cattleman who holds the lease released cattle but then had to round them all up and take … Continue reading
Ah, it’s election season. And unlike last time, when the early field of hopeless hopefuls consisted mostly of stodgy undistinguished and indistinguishable repubs, this time we have a herd of whacky commies trying to out 5-year-plan one another. There’s amusement … Continue reading
Just this minute, out the front window. The feeder is open for business. I’d take a picture, but the phone’s connected to the laptop.
Torso Boy and I didn’t roll out until after six, so I started the morning behind the curve and trying to catch up. Got halfway coffied up, then cooked breakfast for me and the boy which meant that halfway through … Continue reading
I was going to take the day off entirely – in fact I considered spending the afternoon in bed – because I raised some pressure sores on my stump from all the walking I’ve been doing and they need to … Continue reading
Ever since the suggestion was made I’ve been kicking myself for not thinking of bolting a wider shelf up there. Never really occurred to me that she’d come back to that spot, to be honest. Too late now, but I … Continue reading
🙂 Just saw her. She’s working on a nest in the same spot as last year. I’ll post a picture when I can.
…if you zoom in and squint, it’s right above Ian’s solar panels. Yeah, it was pretty faint and I didn’t have a lot of hope for the photo. We had some very light rain yesterday and the clouds seem to … Continue reading
And this is the prettiest I’ve ever seen the pear tree… It’s five years old, planted in deeply amended soil from back when the backhoe worked. I pruned it back a bit a couple of days ago. It grows a … Continue reading
I spent much of the morning up in the pantry loft doing something I’ve been putting off for weeks now: Sorting out canned goods. Because I know how to have fun, and also I suspect “best by” dates on cans … Continue reading
Betcha can’t guess where the trailer tire was leaking. Yeah, of course you can. Same thing: The valve stem is rotten. Who mounts a tire, replacing an obviously years-in-the-sun bald tire, and doesn’t at least check the valve stem?
There’s something I frequently forget/neglect to do when cleaning the Tracker… The Tracker is chambered for .44 Magnum but it’s a lightweight gun more intended for a lot of carrying than for a lot of shooting so believe me you … Continue reading
In early winter I replaced both trailer tires – the shop that mounted them failed to replace the valve stems which were long since rotted from the sun, and one of the new tires promptly went flat. I haven’t used … Continue reading
The first hummingbird has been sighted. Not here at the Lair, but nearby. So I rummaged around under the kitchen counter and set up the feeder. And it is now officially Spring. 🙂
A perfect day for the range! Nobody around at all, light breeze, mid-sixties, not too much sun. I can blaze away to my heart’s content with nobody to be annoyed with me… Except for .22lr I didn’t even lose any … Continue reading
I’m a poor man and ammo costs money. The sight of a case of rifle ammo makes me positively Scroogelike – If I fire one round, I no longer possess a whole case of ammo. There’s also the small matter … Continue reading