Author Archives: Joel

About Joel

You shouldn't ask these questions of a paranoid recluse, you know.

Joel’s little first world problem…

On this morning, September 25 2018, I opened the last can of Trader Joe’s House Blend Coffee that the Secret Lair will ever see. This is one of the two sent me by Generous Readers and I was more inclined … Continue reading

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Augason Farms 48-hour emergency food supply review, Pt. 4: and we’re done here.

My original concept was to live on the contents of this tub exclusively until it was gone, to see what would happen. That would have taken eight long days. I gave up that plan on the afternoon of the second … Continue reading

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Jesus. What honorable person will ever put himself in this position again?

Second Woman Makes Accusation Against Kavanaugh Over something that supposedly happened at Yale. Several decades ago. May or may not have happened at all, may or may not have been Kavanaugh, certainly not something that could ever possibly make it … Continue reading

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Augason Farms 48-hour emergency food supply review, Pt. 3: Lactose Intolerance rears its, er, head.

Alas, this isn’t going to go eight days, or anything like eight days. For my sins I spent most of the afternoon fearful of moving too far from a toilet. My undoing was one of the tub’s principal entrées, Creamy … Continue reading

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Augason Farms 48-hour emergency food supply review, Pt. 2: The Adventure Continues.

Okay: So on my very first day, I cheated on my “emergency food only” diet… …so I didn’t even do the third meal yesterday. I did do lunch, though… …Creamy potato soup. Once again, as is I suppose going to … Continue reading

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Oh, is it going to work now?

Well okay then. I guess I’ll just drop what I’m doing, go back to the Lair, fire up the laptop, download all those photos currently floating around in Data Pergatory somewhere, and write that food review post I tried to … Continue reading

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Augason Farms 48-hour emergency food supply review – the beginning

Okay, so this morning we opened the tub. And immediately encountered our first snag. The tub bills itself as 48 hours of food for four people, and that’s the way it’s packaged. Not 192 hours of food for one person. … Continue reading

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Useful/fun care packages, and also announcing a new review series.

Look what Big Brother sent me… Two tubs of this Augason Farms emergency storage food, promising 48 hours worth of food for four people – or eight days for one person? We Shall See. Tomorrow morning the tub gets unsealed. … Continue reading

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See, this is why Socialism is good.

Under socialism, no matter how bad things might get due to the machinations of the Looters and Wreckers and External Enemiestm, our beloved masters will still be okay. They’ll do great, in fact. And that’s good, right? Because they’re so … Continue reading

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If the Great Computer in the Sky will allow me to post this…

Yes. It was 5:30 in the blessed AM and I was baking bread. Why, you ask? What sane person would be doing that at such a time, when all good little boys and girls should be warm in their beds? … Continue reading

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(tap tap) This thing on?

Yeah, okay, the host has been having big server problems for some time, obviously. I’m told they’re on it, and also to expect more outages until the issue is resolved. Kind of figured that last bit out for myself and … Continue reading

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Back to the cattle waterer…

…goes the game camera. Left it there for two days, and… That’s all that happened. I guess I should be happy there were birds this time. Boy, that place jumped last winter. Now it’s dead as disco. But I know … Continue reading

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Private to the person…

Who sent that maple syrup some months ago… Yum. Just saying. I don’t actually make pancakes very often because it’s a large hassle factor for one guy. Hassle factor is the principal reason for my usual breakfast of Spammo Classico. … Continue reading

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That’s sexist.

H/T

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Diane Feinstein touched me inappropriately!

There, I said it. It was sometime back when I was in grammar school, I think. Can’t quite recall. Other people saw it, though. Two people, or maybe four. But I said it, so it must be true. When’s her … Continue reading

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One more coat, I think…

I spent the whole of yesterday morning going to town and schlepping hay with D&L, so never got back to the back door. First thing this morning after chicken chores I gave it a light sanding and a third coat … Continue reading

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The babies are doing well…

…after their first night out of the cage. Actually I suspect they may have overnighted in the cage, since there were two or three in it when I visited this morning. But mostly they’re out and about. Like any flightless … Continue reading

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There’s another bird in the woodstove…

😀 And it’s fluttering around in there driving Laddie batshit crazy. ETA: I opened the door, it flew out, and Laddie caught it! Wonder if that’s his first vertebrate kill?

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Free the Chickenhouse Fourteen!

Sorry, guys. The Official TUAK IT Department had a major server crash, they’ve got expensive servers lying everywhere, dramatically holding their knees and groaning and wailing about Worker’s Comp. All these trays and broken champagne flutes everywhere…it’s a mess, but … Continue reading

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Decided to go with varnish…

Exterior urethane, really. Couldn’t decide on a third color for the back door and finally decided I liked it the way it was, except the original varnish was pretty much gone. So first thing this morning I sanded down the … Continue reading

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