I’m really surprised I don’t see more of this sort of thing, but this one landed unsought in my lap.
You ever wonder what people with backyard chicken flocks do when their chickens get too old to lay eggs? Suburbanites sometimes make the mistake of treating the hens like pets, then find out the unpleasant creatures can outlive their usefulness by a decade or more and suddenly it’s not all fun and games. Some people have even, heaven help them, set up shelters for unwanted chickens.
The more sensible ones, who don’t want to bloody their own hands, look around for somebody willing to slaughter the birds for them. And that’s when they find out that your average chicken farmer turns a cold ear to this sort of appeal. Chicken slaughtering is unpleasant drudgery. Bad enough to do it for yourself on any scale, and why would you want to do it for some squeamish stranger? Laying hens are second-rate meat fit for boiling and not much else, so it’s not worth any money. So those looking for a chicken-slaughtering business to solve their old-hen problem look in vain.
But the economics of a desert hermit are a bit different. I’ve got lots of time, no disposable income, and almost the only meat I eat is what I kill myself. So when I get a text from a neighbor saying (paraphrased) “There’s a person in town who’s looking for somebody to slaughter ten chickens. Pays half the meat,” I say “Sure. Why not?”
Still waiting for details.
Probably safe from the nanny-nazis that way, but don’t start taking cash for this little service. Even where you are… But otherwise… good deal.
Joel, here’s Julia Child’s recipe for cooking an old chicken, typically a rooster, but any old barnyard fowl. I think the key is the longer cooking time, not necessarily the red wine in which the bird is stewed.
Julia Child’s Coq au Vin Recipe
The Ultimate Answer to Old Birds . . . slow-cooker or pressure-cooker.
My daughter came home from a white elephant gift exchange with an unwanted rooster. He made decent pot pie after a day in the slow cooker.
Hmm… This may make me reconsider the kind of people we hang out with.
Is there any such thing as a WANTED rooster?
Back in November Landlady turned one of hers into a fairly decent roast.
Old layers make great Chicken ‘n Dumplings. A simple recipe my grandfather used was: A large pot of water to cover the chicken, a little finely-chopped onion, celery, and parsley (though you could put the parsley in the dumpling dough), salt, pepper and sage to taste. Cook chicken until tender, then remove from the pot and brown in oven (whole or cut up). Add dumplings (either “slick”- or “drop”-type) to the stewing water, and stir gently 2 or 3 times while cooking to keep from sticking together.
Joel, this is off topic, but, since I can’t find your email address, here’s a piece on off the grid living you may find of interest to post or comment on, or maybe just read.
http://finance.yahoo.com/news/family-life-off-the-grid-abe-connally-vela-creations-144054081.html
Don’t forget to scald & skin the feet for to make a great broth!
And if you think chicken shelters are over the top…chickens in sweaters:
http://www.buzzfeed.com/babymantis/20-pictures-of-chickens-wearing-sweaters-1opu
And on the top…hats to complement the ensemble:
http://www.craftsy.com/pattern/knitting/pet/easter-chicken-coats-with-matching-hats/49864
For scrawney ones, there’s a trick that works with pheasants (haven’t tried it on domestic fowlzez yet, it might need more strength than we’ve got)
Lay the dead bird on its back on the ground, put a foot on the root of each wing, hold the legs and slowly pull them up. I don’t know how that will work out with your leg though, hmmmm.
The [bird’s] legs and guts and most of the skin and feathers come away from the breast and a couple of snips with garden pruning shears has the breast separated from all of the waste. you can snip the legs out too – if you want them.
For tenderizing ancient fowlzez; goose shooters used to reckon that burying them in the ground worked, the idea was to leave them there until you’d forgotten where it was.
There was also the suggestion of stuffing it with a whole onion, and cooking really slowly, and once it was done, eating the onion, and chucking the rest away.
The neatest killing method I’ve ever seen was a market stall holder in Hong Kong, he held the wings up above its back, as far down as he could between the thumb and middle finger of his weak hand, and held its head back with the first finger of his weak hand, that left the throat exposed. He just cut its throat and dropped it into a decent size plastic bucket with a bit of board and a stone on top for it to bleed out and flap. no fuss at all.
Now, after the gorey bits. My ex has pet hens and rooster which come running to get cuddled. they’ll happily ride around on her shoulders all day – crapping all the time.