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They say that Louis XIV had the inscription Ultima Ratio Regum cast into all the cannon of the French Army. It means “The Ultimate Argument of Kings,” and that always struck me as one of the most honest and up-front things any ruler or would-be ruler ever said. “We can dress it up prettier than this, but when it comes down to the unvarnished truth this is what it’s about: You’ll do as I say or I’ll send my goons to kill you.”
I thought about that for a long time. If there’s an ultimate argument, it seems only logical that there must be an ultimate answer. For years I thought the ultimate answer must be the bullets in my rifle, but it never seemed quite right. I’ve got bullets – he’s got frigging Cannon Balls. I mean, if there were three hundred million rifles throwing bullets at him, then maybe. But we all know that’s not going to happen. So if there’s an ultimate answer to his ultimate argument, it sure as hell ain’t bullets.
It finally came to me – and that’s when I abandoned the city and most of my stuff, and gave all that was behind me a good stiff Randian Shrug.
The ultimate answer to kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh.
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Laddie the Amazing Torso Boy 2011-2020
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It occurs to me that the idiots who actually think TSA (“Hey, Joe; I think I spotted a gun on this X-r..” Forget the guns, John; we’ve got CUPCAKES!” “Ooooh, _cupcakes_ [drool]”) groping is good security… Well, the closest they probably get to getting laid is TSO fondling and Internet pr0n. That would account for the priorities.
It is, on sober reflection, the most poignant thing I’ve seen on the internet in a long time.
(nb: If you replace “internet” with “30-round magazines”, you’ll see its like scattered through both our sidebars…)