I was recently attacked and wounded by a local animal.

A creature so foul, so cruel, that no man yet has fought with it and lived! Bones of full 50 men lie strewn about its lair! So, brave knights,if you do doubt your courage or your strength, come no further. For death awaits you all with nasty big pointy teeth!

A creature so foul, so cruel, that no man yet has fought with it and lived! Bones of full 50 men lie strewn about its lair! So, brave knights,if you do doubt your courage or your strength, come no further. For death awaits you all with nasty big pointy teeth!

She’s much larger in person, let me tell you. She’s Maya (not actually shown in the photo,) a 12-year-old blind and deaf and really cranky Shih Tzu who has never liked me.

Normally she puts up with me after a lot of barking and growling, but I went in there when L was on a day trip to take Maya for a walky, which involved a leash, which involved me actually touching Maya when her person wasn’t around, which Maya wasn’t prepared to countenance in the least.

Honestly, I wouldn’t have thought she could open that tiny mouth wide enough to insert a human hand. I wouldn’t have thought those bitsy little teeth would break skin. Wrong and wrong. She turned like a snake and got me on the hand, and when I failed to learn my lesson and tried again she got me on the other hand.

That’s never happened to me before.

She got put on her leash, and we went for her walky, because I don’t take shit from purse dogs. But damned if she didn’t take her revenge for the indignity.

About Joel

You shouldn't ask these questions of a paranoid recluse, you know.
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11 Responses to I was recently attacked and wounded by a local animal.

  1. Kentucky says:

    Bet you are relieved it wan’t LB.

  2. Joel says:

    If LB ever pulled such a thing, I’d keep my remaining hand carefully out of his reach…while struggling with the tourniquet.

  3. M says:

    1) Little Dogs suck mostly because they are Babied or have a Napoleonic Complex
    2) A Handled Fish net makes them easy to catch
    3) Foam antibiotic is your friend.

  4. anonymous says:

    Must be an unwritten law of Universe that the small dogs have the largest chip on their shoulder.

  5. Ben says:

    That’s funny Joel. Considering that she found both of your hands, one must wonder exactly how blind she is. I would suggest gloves next time, and take those little wounds seriously.

  6. coloradohermit says:

    When I’m 84 (unlikely), blind and deaf, I’ll probably be cranky too. Although biting isn’t my style, so the attack would probably be a verbal tirade of curses. We’ve always had small dogs, formerly toy poodles and currently a chiweenie, and they are every terrible thing you’ve ever heard about them if strangers are around.

  7. Joel says:

    Considering that she found both of your hands, one must wonder exactly how blind she is.

    I’m taking L’s word on the blind thing. She’s obviously not completely blind, since she can walk right up to you and seems able to avoid furniture. But in this case she didn’t actually bite until I touched her tiny little harness, at which point she turned (very dexterously, may I say) and struck at the hand that touched her.

  8. Zelda says:

    Are all of your immunizations up to date? If not they are usually free or very inexpensive at a public health clinic. Animal bites and scratches are serious and a danger to your health. Immediate soap and water washing and an antibiotic wouldn’t be overkill and the little darling can wait for her walkie.

  9. Kentucky says:

    One of our elderly neighbors had a pair of dogs . . . one a little yappy waste and the other a beautiful red Dobie. Whenever anyone approached the home place, the little furball would raise all kinds of hell, barking and snarling and doing false charges that stopped just short of your leg. If you advanced further, the little fart would run back and sit down between the Dobie’s front feet and continue the fume. The Dobie would just sit there and stare at you, and show her teeth. ‘Nuff said.

    It was actually quite funny, so long as the Dobie didn’t stand up.

  10. Andrew says:

    I had a blind cat once, no eyes at all, that would walk up to you and then ‘look’ at you starting with your feet and ending up ‘eye to no-eye’. Kinda spooky. We called her ‘Helen.’

    She would run around the house with her head held low, whiskers forward like a broom. Crazy scary to watch her chase and ‘kill’ mylar scrunchy balls (made lots of noise.)

  11. John says:

    Along lines of what Zelda said. Many years ago met a cat that did a similar quick bite at my right hand. Really sharp toothed little critter! Didn’t give it much thought at the time, but a few days later I started losing use of the hand. Seems one tooth got deep enough to inject some nastiness. Subsequent antibiotics didn’t help much. When the lymph system vein in the right arm started turning color it was off to the ER where they administered a shot of penicillin. Wrote with the left hand for about three weeks. Was almost getting good at it! Anyhow, keep an eye out if it is any more than a surface scratch. :-)

To the stake with the heretic!