It’s a shame the “right people” don’t read Kipling.

Borepatch is right about that. (I kind of disagree that it’s only the Democrats.)

Norman and Saxon

“My son,” said the Norman Baron,
“I am dying, and you will be heir
To all the broad acres in England
That William gave me for share
When he conquered the Saxon at Hastings,
And a nice little handful it is.
But before you go over to rule it
I want you to understand this:–

“The Saxon is not like us Normans.
His manners are not so polite.
But he never means anything serious
Till he talks about justice and right.
When he stands like an ox in the furrow
With his sullen set eyes on your own,
And grumbles, ‘This isn’t fair dealing,’
My son, leave the Saxon alone.

“You can horsewhip your Gascony archers,
Or torture your Picardy spears;
But don’t try that game on the Saxon;
You’ll have the whole brood round your ears.
From the richest old Thane in the county
To the poorest chained serf in the field,
They’ll be at you and on you like hornets,
And, if you are wise, you will yield.

“But first you must master their language,
Their dialect, proverbs and songs.
Don’t trust any clerk to interpret
When they come with the tale of their wrongs.
Let them know that you know what they’re saying;
Let them feel that you know what to say.
Yes, even when you want to go hunting,
Hear ’em out if it takes you all day.

They’ll drink every hour of the daylight
And poach every hour of the dark.
It’s the sport not the rabbits they’re after
(We’ve plenty of game in the park).
Don’t hang them or cut off their fingers.
That’s wasteful as well as unkind,
For a hard-bitten, South-country poacher
Makes the best man-at-arms you can find.

“Appear with your wife and the children
At their weddings and funerals and feasts.
Be polite but not friendly to Bishops;
Be good to all poor parish priests.
Say ‘we,’ ‘us’ and ‘ours’ when you’re talking,
Instead of ‘you fellows’ and ‘I.’
Don’t ride over seeds; keep your temper;
And never you tell ’em a lie!”

If ol’ Rudyard were around today, he could call it “Coastal Elite and Flyover Deplorable,” and barely change a word. And the present-day Normans would pay not one jot more attention to the advice than the original ones did.

About Joel

You shouldn't ask these questions of a paranoid recluse, you know.
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3 Responses to It’s a shame the “right people” don’t read Kipling.

  1. M Ryan says:

    Nicely done and so very true. Thank you for the post.

  2. You spelled “wrong people” wrong.

  3. Good point. Our current “coastal elite” thing is nothing new and Kipling explained rather well how to defuse the situation.

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