Let us be lovers! We’ll marry our arugula salads together.

Of course, this being the place where the ultimate answer to kings (and progressive gasbags) is a belly laugh, the belly laugh arrived first. Regular reader (and longtime TCF buddy) mutti sent this:

Advance team of journalists left literally shaking after scouting run for #HuffPoInTheHeartland tour

The tour isn’t on till September, but the parodies began more-or-less instantly.


I wondered what the hell this was about, so I followed the rabbit hole down – so you didn’t have to. Came up with this bit of fluff…

We’re hitting the road on a 23-city tour to hear concerns from across the nation.

We want to know: What does it mean to be American today? To find out, we’re hitting the road this fall to interview people about their hopes, dreams, fears and definition of “being American.” By converting a tour bus into a mobile video studio, we’ll capture conversations with people of all ages and backgrounds. Our goal: moving, multimedia storytelling that showcases what we share as Americans, rather than what divides us.
Why we are doing this
Trust in media has bottomed out. We hope to rebuild some of that — and learn from it — by listening to the public and elevating their stories through our massive distribution network.
How we are making it happen
We will travel the old-fashioned way — via bus — to 20-plus states to hear from some of the under-heard, diverse Americans who make up the communities that form much of our nation. And by working on the ground with community leaders, nonprofits, educational institutions, local businesses and others, we’ll make sure people know we’re there to listen.

Uh huh. Turns out [a rotating group of Huffpo “journalists] is going to [“visit,” in some form] a bunch of Hillary-voting cities in red states as an expensive sort of publicity stunt. And this will restore the faith we toothless rubes have lost in ‘media.’

So it’s basically parody all the way down.

About Joel

You shouldn't ask these questions of a paranoid recluse, you know.
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7 Responses to Let us be lovers! We’ll marry our arugula salads together.

  1. Bear says:

    I kinda wish they’d come here. We’d have a lot of fun with ’em.” Bear in mind that this was the site of the quietest, calmest, most peaceful BLM protest ever (after the chief explained the heavily armed facts of life, the organizers decided on a “silent march”).

  2. MamaLiberty says:

    No chance in hell they’ll come anywhere near this place, of course, but if someone were to blow a “rape whistle” in my face…. Let’s just say I would not be amused. Of course, such a coward would not likely come anywhere near me anyway… the visible gun on my hip might inhibit their idiocy. As it is supposed to…

  3. M says:

    Don’t forget “we” will be elevated – I cannot wait to ascend – #stirrednotshaken

  4. Joel says:

    I would not enjoy seeing the results of Huffpo progs “elevating” some of the people in the little town nearest where I live. They’d have no trouble finding self-parodies who could play as Idiocracy extras without makeup. It’d be a propaganda coup: “This is Why Flyover Country Needs Us.”

  5. Zelda says:

    Arugula is an invasive almost impossible to control edible weed that takes over any place where you plant it. Hmmmmmm……

  6. MamaLiberty says:

    Edible, Zelda? I suppose, as compared to something actually poisonous. I tried Arugula once… at a friend’s house. I found it distinctly not edible. It was bitter, prickly and hard to chew. That it is also an invasive weed is simply poetic justice. :)

  7. JERRYDGEEK says:

    Don’t expect The Merry Pranksters from this tour.

To the stake with the heretic!