What an amateur this Obama fellow is…

After I have betrayed the revolution and set myself up as president-for-life, there’ll be a new rule that all politicians except myself who carefully phrase denials of things they’re clearly doing will go straight to the wall without even a pause for the customary pain therapy.
Helpful reference for the benefit of my future minions:

Good: “Death to those who would raise a hand against their leaders and protectors, enemies of the people, looters and wreckers. All those caught hoarding weapons will be shot, for the benefit of the people. Their huddled pathetic bodies will be shot again.”

Bad: “At no point have I ever, ever proposed confiscating guns from responsible gun owners.”

See the difference? One is good old-fashioned straight up despotism, exactly what I (will have been) elected to deliver. The other is just weasel words, unworthy of the Supreme Lord of Every F*cking Thing.

In general, if you’re going to be a despot be despotic. Don’t just be annoying.

Above all, don’t lie. That’s just low. But if you decide you must lie, have the decency to lie. Don’t try to weasel it around so that no word in the sentence is quite a lie, as long as each is taken very literally. Remember: There’s a reason Stalin is a figure of history and Clinton is a figure of fun. Stalin never quibbled over what the meaning of “is” is. If the conversation ever got to that point, he’d just have you shot.

ETA: Speaking of outright lies vs. verbal gymnastics which merely serve to avoid telling the truth, I cannot at this time comment on this. I have a great deal of respect for our nation’s Men in Black, and have no wish to put them to the trouble of traveling all the way out here to knock on my door.

About Joel

You shouldn't ask these questions of a paranoid recluse, you know.
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To the stake with the heretic!