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They say that Louis XIV had the inscription Ultima Ratio Regum cast into all the cannon of the French Army. It means “The Ultimate Argument of Kings,” and that always struck me as one of the most honest and up-front things any ruler or would-be ruler ever said. “We can dress it up prettier than this, but when it comes down to the unvarnished truth this is what it’s about: You’ll do as I say or I’ll send my goons to kill you.”
I thought about that for a long time. If there’s an ultimate argument, it seems only logical that there must be an ultimate answer. For years I thought the ultimate answer must be the bullets in my rifle, but it never seemed quite right. I’ve got bullets – he’s got frigging Cannon Balls. I mean, if there were three hundred million rifles throwing bullets at him, then maybe. But we all know that’s not going to happen. So if there’s an ultimate answer to his ultimate argument, it sure as hell ain’t bullets.
It finally came to me – and that’s when I abandoned the city and most of my stuff, and gave all that was behind me a good stiff Randian Shrug.
The ultimate answer to kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh.
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Laddie the Amazing Torso Boy 2011-2020
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Category Archives: Uncategorized
Well that makes it official…
Good news! CCI Blazer .44 Special ammo is back on the shelves! After a 3-year drought! Bad news! A little over a month ago I said I was going to transition from a .44 revolver, some version of which I’ve … Continue reading
I want one of those 30-minute repair jobs that only take half an hour.
Yesterday D tried to drive his Jeep to the big town about 50 miles away. Apparently he didn’t get much farther than the far outskirts of the crappy little desert town nearest where we live, when the Jeep began performing … Continue reading
Score, one engine rat
So day before yesterday I found a rat trying to build yet another nest on top of the Jeep’s engine. This rat was so sure of itself – and probably so pregnant -I even saw it rather sluggishly exit stage … Continue reading
I feel better now.
Every single propane bottle on the property is filled. And all at the same extortionate price they’ve been charging all winter. Paging Dr. Murphy: The price is now free to crash. Somebody might ask why I elected to use little … Continue reading
California Fleein’
I was listening to a podcast this morning while doing chores and somebody mentioned California being so expensive people could only afford rent. I retorted to the empty air, “Hell, I lived in California and slept in my truck some … Continue reading
Outta gas…
I’ve been waiting for this. Seen on this morning’s walkie… Propane bypass regulators will be old news to anybody who ever dealt with any RV but possibly there are homesteaders who never encountered them. The idea is simply that you … Continue reading
Augh – Summer’s first grassfire is here.
Or – well, not here here. Somewhere far upwind. Normally they don’t bother me… …but on top of my allergy woes this is a misery. My eyes are so sore and swollen I can barely see.
Hymn to Breaking Strain
My favorite Kipling poem, by means of Leslie Fish and friends…
Baby bullsnake
Found him coiled up outside Ian’s door when I came up for my evening shower. Mature bullsnakes are docile as can be but babies, being less the masters of their world, can get salty when scared. Still don’t have any … Continue reading
Last Day of May
Hanging out, not getting anything done but filling handkerchiefs. Not sleeping very well. About semi-conscious the past few days. May is still my favorite month – but I’m reminded of the downsides. Still… …even if I can’t smell the flowers … Continue reading
Elfland
I don’t know what the visuals have to do with the song, it’s just the only video I could find with the right audio. Happens to be my favorite Leslie Fish song.
My big boy…
I was just reading some two-year-old posts about when Tobie came to live with me, since it’s been almost exactly two years. Came upon the story of how he told me he wanted his own bed… Generous Reader MM promptly … Continue reading
You fell victim to one of the classic blunders!
The most famous is “Never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line.” But only slightly less well known is this: “When your gigantic bag of free food has been replaced with a mousetrap, don’t stick your … Continue reading
“Oh yeah. I can do that now.”
Never fails: May is my favorite month but sooner or later some species of amorous plant is going to get my nose streaming. And here’s me out of any real antihistamine, and Monday four days away…Wait! I can do this … Continue reading
“Who run Bartertown?”
Oh, there’s something in the air and it’s got my nose running day and night. All last week was rainy, and now it has turned clear and hot. Something’s spreading pollen and it has gone straight to my sinuses. Surprised … Continue reading
And there it goes again.
I sometimes wonder if the managers of the crappy little food store in the crappy little desert town nearest where I live have even bothered to quantify how much of what ought to be their business they’ve driven to the … Continue reading
Tobie-proofing the muffins…
Tobie may not be the champion counter-surfer of all time but he has every other dog in my personal experience beat hands-down. And so… …Precautions are required. I always have to bunker the eggs anyway. You bet he can reach … Continue reading
Somebody lose a piece of rainbow?
Seen during today’s morning walkie…
First-world problem in a third-world setting…
This really annoyed me… I needed my digital caliper for the first time in a long time, only to find its battery dead. Okay, no sweat: the battery didn’t owe me anything and I have a Plan B dial caliper. … Continue reading
Somebody asked about the goat people the other day…
One other thing happened during this morning’s bike ride. I’ve had to watch out while going past the goat peoples’ property because their dogs (there are now three but that won’t last) have taken to chasing cars and of course … Continue reading









































