PETA’s Advice to Survivalists: Go Vegan!

Seriously, you can’t make this stuff up…

“Whether you live in an underground bunker or a penthouse suite, the best way to ensure that you’ll still be around next year is to ditch meat and go vegan,” says PETA Executive Vice President Tracy Reiman. “By maintaining a vegan diet, the bunkered survivors would be in better shape to adapt to their post-apocalyptic world and would help put an end to the doomsday scenarios that animals on factory farms and in slaughterhouses face every day.”

About Joel

You shouldn't ask these questions of a paranoid recluse, you know.
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7 Responses to PETA’s Advice to Survivalists: Go Vegan!

  1. I swear on a stack of smoldering Korans that I will eat one of them before I go vegan voluntarily..

  2. Mayberry says:

    BWAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAhahahaHAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Oh Lord I haven’t laughed so hard in a long time! I want a hamburger…

  3. David III says:

    Just had some juicy steak!

  4. Pat H. says:

    Vegans are, by medical definition, missing enough essential micro-nutrients to be classified as mentally impaired.

    That article is adequate proof.

  5. Anonymous says:

    I have met quite a number of vegans, all very unhealthy people. Distinct lack of a working immune system, always under the weather…muscles of that of a 90 year old…

    But red meat will kill you!

  6. Tell her to put sprouts in her underwear and I’ll think about it briefly. Until then I want some fucking bacon.

  7. Ramen Fiend says:

    Well, veggies have a lot to offer, but I like cheese and meat, and fish, and eggs, and octopus, and the occasional bug. Besides, fish stock makes a lot of veggies worth eating.

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