My diet tends to be pretty monotonous – I eat a lot of bread. I could do better, I have a lot of ingredients and access to the Internet. But I’m lazy and in general food isn’t really all that important to me. It’s just fuel.
But once in a blue moon I look at a couple of random ingredients on a shelf or somewhere, a few disused synapses fire, and I think, “I could do that.” And so it was that yesterday I decided to try my hand at pizza.
Guilty secret: There are two (and only two) things I remember fondly about southern california: The weather, and the knowledge that ham and pineapple actually do go together very well. Seemed like abomination when I first heard about it, like unto the way people there like to smear pulverized avocados on everything. But it works, and it became one of my two favorite ways to eat pizza.
But I’d never made pizza in my life. I’m just not much of a cook.
Yesterday I gave it a try. Looked up a pizza dough recipe, not to my surprise it’s very simple. Bread is something that doesn’t intimidate me, and pizza is just a really big flat piece of bread with stuff on it, right?
I didn’t have to improvise the bread, but everything else was catch-as-catch-can…
Big Brother had sent me a couple of big cans of “canned ham,” really compressed pork bits with lots of salt. Between you and me I prefer spam for sandwiches, but this stuff goes to pieces very well and so except for the saltiness it makes an acceptable pizza topping. I had one single can of pineapple chunks, I believe also from BB. Of course I keep at least a dozen cans of spaghetti sauce on hand. And that’s it for this foray, really.
Pop it in the oven at 400o … and it came out ten minutes later warm but very gooey. No sooner had I put the pizza in the oven, it seems, than the propane bottle ran out of pressure.
Yeah, but I hate when it happens while I’m baking, you know? It always ruins the bake, and while it’s hard to go very wrong while baking something this simple, dough with a whole can of spaghetti sauce on it really ought to be baked quick. This…wasn’t. I brought it out of the oven after ten minutes and it was still gooey. So I had to replace the bottle, take the pizza and the rack out of the oven, re-light the pilot, heat the oven, then do the bake again. The results were imperfect.
Cold pizza in the morning, BTW, has always been a favorite breakfast.