Knowing you just paid $130 for a shovel.
But wait! There’s more! This isn’t just any shovel, you mall ninjas. This is the tacticalest shovel in the entire physical universe.
Includes Over 12 tools & carry bag:
Shovel
Axe
Hammer
Saw
Hoe
Utility Knife
Phillips & Flat-head Screwdriver
Ferrocerium Rod (Fire Starter)
Compass
Whistle
Bottle Opener
Hex Bolt Wrenches
Wire Cutter
Rechargeable Tactical Light & Mount
First Aid Kit
It actually comes with a mountable flashlight. A tactical one. I didn’t look to see where they stuck the whistle and the compass.
This is…seriously the greatest thing ever. I recommend that everyone who ever slapped down $40 for a concealed carry permit badge purchase at least two of these immediately. Two is one! Because one is none, and that’s tactical.
ETA: I just went back to the linked site (Yeah. I’m bored. It’s raining.) and found that I hadn’t given this shovel nearly enough credit for tacticalness. I should be sued by its marketers for not pointing out that the handle is not only hollow, but also comes apart in 3! Yes, 3! Pieces, for extra super-tactical fragility!
Order yours today!
Bahaha talk about notility.. I think ill take my axe my shovel my hammer and my head lamp and fuck some real shit up or do some real work… Instead of stabbing 18gauge sheet metal and styrofoam… Cmon they didnt even attempt to break ground or use the thing to move dirt… Lol video was hillarious and joel ur description was spot on hahhahaha cuz thats tactical bitches!
Is Kerodin still at it?
I might think this was a “shoot, shovel, shut up” kit if it weren’t for the whistle. ;^)
😀
“…can not be used for deepwater operations. ”
Durn, no use to me.
Er, ah, er…
I thought stuff like this was, like, so, like, yesterday.
Gag me. With a pitchfork.
Now, in a twist to this screwed up world that we live in, I bet the only idiots that buy these things are the ANTIFA poopyheads.
You can replace the flashlight with a scope for those hard to see areas too . . .
$129 but it doesn’t have a rat trap in the handle??? How can you defend your vehicle wiring, household wiring and food supply without a rat and/or mouse trap in the handle?
LOL!! What a terrific way to start the day. A belly laugh indeed. 🙂
The shovel looks like an engineering student project. Super versatile and almost useless.
I made my own tactical pitchfork. It has a Picatinny rail and a laser. It leans against the wall in case I ever have to scare off a miscreant.
Just think if you were to get one of these you could hang it next to the $450 pre-stained jeans.
Can’t help wondering . . .
How many shovels did they break making that video?
How many times did a strike ricochet off the target and hit him in the leg?
Does the heavy metal sound track play when the shovel is in use?
Do I have to get tattooed to buy one?
What are all the holes for?
For a wild moment there, I thought that flashlight was a telescopic sight. That would Really make a shovel tactical!