Author Archives: Joel

A parable on the minimum wage.

Gatorade punished for dissing water in video game The settlement stems from the company’s free and award-winning mobile game “Bolt!” which came out in 2012 but is no longer listed in the iTunes store. In the game, the fastest man … Continue reading →

It took three nights, but my buddy in the woodpile finally fell for it. The rat ignored the trap the first night. The second night I found the trap tripped and the bread but not the peanut butter gone. I … Continue reading →

Not that I spend a lot of time reading news on your mag, GQ, but thanks for playing. They’ve probably still got the body. They could hang it by the neck or something, I suppose, but…

The bad news is that this person holds a high position in the American government. The good news? Oh…um…he won’t be in government forever? Hell, now I feel all bad about not using much fossil fuel. What if I’m assaulted? … Continue reading →

I could think of a few things to add, plus (I hate going here but it’s been on my mind) those guys look awfully white for modern tastes. But why gild the lily? I could endorse it as is. h/t

So listen to what you’re told and not what you see on the news, I guess. I’m sorry. Really. I know and have internalized that as a white person I am guilty of racism and cannot ever claim to have … Continue reading →

I wrote a post about a slasher on a NYC subway, who repeatedly stabbed a guy while two of NYPD’s finest watched from the motorman’s compartment where they had locked themselves. When the guy getting stabbed finally successfully defended himself, … Continue reading →

My burn barrels blaze brightly with the debris of the epic but hardly record-breaking rat’s nest formed where I’d foolishly left a whole bunch of lumber for – well – years. Finally got down to the real culprit… This pallet … Continue reading →

…some packrats must fall. And I try to stay relaxed about that but there is one rule. You break it at your literal peril… Don’t Steal My Stuff. Okay, some backstory. Ever since the Great Siding Adventure of 2015 there’s … Continue reading →

I don’t happen to hate white people in general, for the record. I can think of a couple of white people whose obituaries I would take some satisfaction in reading, but not because they’re white or any other particular color. … Continue reading →

I am absolutely not making this up. WASHINGTON (WMAL) — Plans to erect a statue of former DC Mayor Marion Barry outside the Wilson Building are moving forward. This week, the City Council was briefed by Arthur Espinoza, the executive … Continue reading →

It’s a good thing I had a pocketful of money when I woke this morning, because I sure don’t now. But I do have full bottles of liquid refreshment. One of these propane bottles has been waiting empty since early … Continue reading →

With the assistance – and, er, frequent encouragement – of a friend of the blog, TUAK now has a Patreon account! TUAK readers have been very generous to old Uncle Joel over the years, and I tell myself this isn’t … Continue reading →

So this morning I got this much wood cut into stove lengths. Added to what I did day before yesterday, total for the week is probably in the neighborhood of 3/4 trailerload. Not to goal, but screw it. The nice … Continue reading →

…from last year or the year before. “Don’t buy firestarters, cut your own from those firelogs people who use their fireplaces twice a year buy.” It seemed like a pretty good idea, and last winter I actually purchased a firelog … Continue reading →

Turns out the Guardian was only screwing with my head. Death of Queensland’s largest crocodile in 30 years could spark violent power grab And right away I’m thinking, okay, in what way does a dead crocodile send bureaucrats and/or politicians … Continue reading →

I received an email from a commenter yesterday, which I reproduce in its entirety… Joel: Is it my imagination or is the site becoming one long “let’s all tell Joel what/when/how/why/where to do stuff”? I mean, the occasional tip or … Continue reading →

Spent all yesterday afternoon nursing a stomach ache and sitting on the throne, and didn’t accomplish one blessed thing. Woke this morning feeling both better and rather rushed – I have a lot of little things to do before settling … Continue reading →

Two hours with that cordless reciprocating saw, and this is all I accomplished… And I don’t think that saw is going to be with me a long time. It’s not behaving well. I have three of these cordless B&D tools … Continue reading →