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They say that Louis XIV had the inscription Ultima Ratio Regum cast into all the cannon of the French Army. It means “The Ultimate Argument of Kings,” and that always struck me as one of the most honest and up-front things any ruler or would-be ruler ever said. “We can dress it up prettier than this, but when it comes down to the unvarnished truth this is what it’s about: You’ll do as I say or I’ll send my goons to kill you.”
I thought about that for a long time. If there’s an ultimate argument, it seems only logical that there must be an ultimate answer. For years I thought the ultimate answer must be the bullets in my rifle, but it never seemed quite right. I’ve got bullets – he’s got frigging Cannon Balls. I mean, if there were three hundred million rifles throwing bullets at him, then maybe. But we all know that’s not going to happen. So if there’s an ultimate answer to his ultimate argument, it sure as hell ain’t bullets.
It finally came to me – and that’s when I abandoned the city and most of my stuff, and gave all that was behind me a good stiff Randian Shrug.
The ultimate answer to kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh.
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Author Archives: Joel
I lived in Texas, Charlie. Never met a nazi.
Get a load of this bullshit… Why, that makes me want to take my AK and…Okay, actually it doesn’t. Did piss me off a bit, though.
Proposition: Eloi don’t need access to keyboards.
The comments are precious and almost give me a little more faith in humanity, and perhaps (almost, not entirely) in Twitterers. h/t to a comment at Claire’s place.
Progress Report: Still not done.
I hoped to have more done by now, but I’m not feeling as well as yesterday. I think this unexpected heat wave is starting to drain my precious bodily givashit. Anyway all the pieces are cut and sanded… LB and … Continue reading
LB likes the new bedroom…
Possibly because, still being uninsulated, it’s nice and cool at night… …but he can’t decide which part he likes best. Sometimes he’s in the corner, sometimes by the door. He can’t have that spot there, that’s where my bed is … Continue reading
Bedroom floor, not done yet.
Okay, while feeding chickens I remembered another chore I’d really wanted to finish this week… I’ve tended these batteries at TC’s place for the past two years, but “tended” mostly meant “checked that they were still there, and that rats … Continue reading
The Vulgar Curmudgeon has moved.
With a hearty “F*ck Google,” Phil is off to his new WordPress platform. Blogroll updated.
Ah. I love when that happens.
I’m a 63-year-old hermit. 63 isn’t that old, it’s the new 40, I’m told. But I’ve got a lot of collision damage, and I don’t generally hop out of bed full of vim, vigor and vitality. Most mornings it’s more … Continue reading
Any inventors out there?
I had a thought last night, while checking battery voltage. You may recall the Lair’s powershed has essentially two separate battery banks at the moment, and only a single indoor voltage monitor. It’s connected to the 12v line, so I … Continue reading
Trump personally drowns puppies, old ladies.
Many more virgin sacrifices than Obama administration, anonymous sources report. After destroying the Texas coast and the city of Houston with Hurricane Harvey, purchased from Russia with funds laundered from the Republican National Committee, President Trump is here shown personally … Continue reading
Meanwhile everyone in Houston cries, “If only we had some social justice warriors!”
Cajun Navy to Texas: “We got your six.” One year after the Cajun Navy fleet deployed to pluck stranded families from the flood waters that overwhelmed southeast Louisiana, the volunteer rescuers are mobilizing again. The Cajun Navy is blasting social … Continue reading
Closet floor roughed in…
Everything’s cut, but the last couple by the door aren’t nailed down because I had a little oopsie… 🙁 I believe that’s what’s known in the carpentry trade as “piss poor planning.” Fortunately I can make a hardware run tomorrow. … Continue reading
Check this out.
Neighbor S came over and re-did everything I did on Landlady’s batteries day before yesterday, bigger. Now, check this out: With this many batteries it’s nearly impossible to keep from blocking at least some filler caps with stiff cables. Let … Continue reading
Starting on the floor
I borrowed Neighbor S’s table saw and set it up next to the bench under the eave of Landlady’s barn. I have five sheets of nice clear plywood that have been stored in the barn since all the building materials … Continue reading
Oh! Oh! Block me too!
I sometimes fear that Stephen King’s cogwork may have chipped a tooth or two, here and there… But we have been informed that he doesn’t like Trump, and is therefore righteous and virtuous. Hey! We have that in common! Now … Continue reading
The last of the wiring
I got stalled on the addition’s electrical work because I just flat ran out of wire. With last weekend’s care packages I could finally bring it to an end with the last lamps… A couple of years ago Big Brother … Continue reading
Anybody here in the path of that hurricane?
If so, best wishes and I hope you’re bugged out or battened down. The forecasts have grown increasingly shrill over the past 24 hours, and today’s the day. Be safe out there.
Landlady gets a new battery bank
Okay, today’s the day. No more putting it off, Joel. Go get’em. Somewhere in the desert is a prefab shed with a bunch of six-volt batteries. Those batteries are now Landlady’s property, which means they’re in the wrong place. Since … Continue reading
Following yesterday’s triumphs against racism…
Famed ESPN racist Robert Lee having been removed from announcing a University of Virginia football game, and his infamous WHITE horse Traveler having been banned from the USC games he has opened for 57 years, it has been decided that … Continue reading
Now technically it’s a 3-room cabin.
How’s this for a masterpiece of the carpentry arts, which took a whole seven minutes to knock together. Yeah, it’s a partial wall because light and heat and ventilation. It’ll be vented on the bottom, too. I cut the 2X4s … Continue reading









































