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They say that Louis XIV had the inscription Ultima Ratio Regum cast into all the cannon of the French Army. It means “The Ultimate Argument of Kings,” and that always struck me as one of the most honest and up-front things any ruler or would-be ruler ever said. “We can dress it up prettier than this, but when it comes down to the unvarnished truth this is what it’s about: You’ll do as I say or I’ll send my goons to kill you.”
I thought about that for a long time. If there’s an ultimate argument, it seems only logical that there must be an ultimate answer. For years I thought the ultimate answer must be the bullets in my rifle, but it never seemed quite right. I’ve got bullets – he’s got frigging Cannon Balls. I mean, if there were three hundred million rifles throwing bullets at him, then maybe. But we all know that’s not going to happen. So if there’s an ultimate answer to his ultimate argument, it sure as hell ain’t bullets.
It finally came to me – and that’s when I abandoned the city and most of my stuff, and gave all that was behind me a good stiff Randian Shrug.
The ultimate answer to kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh.
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groan
Luckily, we’re snowed in, otherwise I would demand my five minutes back.
So that’s where my father-in-law got all those lame jokes.
You mean you don’t understand how to use the Youtube button that looks like a gear to watch such things at 2x speed, Robert? That way you would only have lost a little more than two minutes…
Well, that’s one way to start the day.
Must be my warped sense of humor, but I thought that it was great………..
I laughed, please don’t tell anyone.
ohhhhh nooooo goran. I did smile. Actually, a clever play on words. Snowed in here as well. I am really, really snowed in: our private roads will be plowed by tonight. I am not complaining. A great excuse to spend the day at home. **
Why do Sven qvuit his countings of da sleets? Do it has someting to do mitenzer seagulls?
[Yes, I agree. I’ll burn forever for that. As well I should.) (But, on the grand scale of pier stories, this is a pretty good ‘un.)
I wondered yesterday before posting this if I even had any readers too young to get the gag. Commenters, at least, all seem of the appropriate age.
Now I realize why it took me so long to get the joke! The writers think that Schlitz is *beer*! 😛