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They say that Louis XIV had the inscription Ultima Ratio Regum cast into all the cannon of the French Army. It means “The Ultimate Argument of Kings,” and that always struck me as one of the most honest and up-front things any ruler or would-be ruler ever said. “We can dress it up prettier than this, but when it comes down to the unvarnished truth this is what it’s about: You’ll do as I say or I’ll send my goons to kill you.”
I thought about that for a long time. If there’s an ultimate argument, it seems only logical that there must be an ultimate answer. For years I thought the ultimate answer must be the bullets in my rifle, but it never seemed quite right. I’ve got bullets – he’s got frigging Cannon Balls. I mean, if there were three hundred million rifles throwing bullets at him, then maybe. But we all know that’s not going to happen. So if there’s an ultimate answer to his ultimate argument, it sure as hell ain’t bullets.
It finally came to me – and that’s when I abandoned the city and most of my stuff, and gave all that was behind me a good stiff Randian Shrug.
The ultimate answer to kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh.
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Author Archives: Joel
It’s cool that some politicians want to get on the right side of this.
It’s not that weird. What are my thoughts about the ruling in California that Americans don't have right to carry concealed guns? pic.twitter.com/YnMyMyheBq — Greg Abbott (@GregAbbott_TX) June 10, 2016
Okay, so it’s not the most genteel thing that happened today…
Landlady and I were working in her barn late this morning when her dog Dharma started going nuts out in front. Dharma doesn’t have a lot of attention span for most things, but she is a born ratter. There’s a … Continue reading
Ballots for the coming election need a NOTA box in, oh, just the worst way.
Many of your friends will tell you that if you go on this way, refusing to choose, you are engaging in a “both sides” fallacy. They will say that in fact, Donald Trump is more likely to blow up the … Continue reading
Give Hillary a break, she’s just going with what she knows.
Blizzard of Lies By WILLIAM SAFIRE Published: January 8, 1996 Americans of all political persuasions are coming to the sad realization that our First Lady — a woman of undoubted talents who was a role model for many in her … Continue reading
Having dispensed with the second amendment, those dress-wearing very fine fellows in San Francisco are working on the fourth.
…In the service of your friend and mine, the DEA. DEA Wants Inside Your Medical Records to Fight the War on Drugs The DEA has claimed for years that under federal law it has the authority to access [Oregon’s] Prescription … Continue reading
All a matter of perspective, I suppose…
The shooter comes inside for lunch, looks at the news… Breaking News: Shots Fired at Dallas’ Love Airport “Dammit!” says the shooter, tired of getting blamed every time some crazy does something bad. “YAY!” says Michael Bloomberg, rubbing his hands … Continue reading
Getting an early start while it’s cool…
This week has been all about yard clean-up. I had to haul out about 40 sandbags, rake much packrat nest rubbish out from under the cabin, move a lot of building materials I had foolishly stored under the cabin on … Continue reading
In 1971 I never met anybody with a George McGovern tattoo…
In fairness, I’d have probably thought it was cool. (But this one looks like a minor character in a Gilbert Shelton comic.) Anyone who can look at this tragic picture and not burst into laughter has no soul. https://t.co/ZE41nGgczk — … Continue reading
Poor Little Bear, #Many
On days like this I’m tempted to feel bad about adopting him. Then I remember he was born in Phoenix – so it was more in the way of a rescue.
Ode to a Cordless Drill
This is really basic to most of you guys. But you know, I’m not really a tool guy. Yeah, I know I was a dealership mechanic/votech teacher/tech instructor/tech writer/training developer and I owned a great big chest of tools but … Continue reading
Joel serves an eviction notice.
Sometime last spring, maybe, I scrounged an eight by eight metal roof off one of Former Neighbor J&H’s goat shelters, intending to raise it on poles over my workbench. Still think it was a good idea, problem is the thing … Continue reading
QoD: “See, this is why I should never read political news in the morning” edition
It’s early yet, but if Clinton successfully walks the tightrope we could experience a dramatic ideological reorganization. A Clinton coalition that mixes populist with establishmentarian, capturing both disgusted center-right Republicans and wary independent Sandernistas, could be the biggest tent American … Continue reading
Insert obvious joke about the report being due in 75 years…
Who (in the state department) did what and when did he/she do it? This is the sort of baffling mystery the state department was created to solve, and it will begin to get to the bottom of it the very … Continue reading
Ol’ Small Engine Joel
If it’s summer, D&L are probably mixing mud for another coat of adobe on their amazing house. Or trying to. They bought an old used mud-mixer that has given them a lot of service, but it hasn’t been entirely trouble-free. … Continue reading
It’s not the material, it’s the delivery.
Here’s the set-up: In its understandable desire to make some hay out of Her Royal Clintonness’ email scandal, the RNC filed a FOIA request with the state department for a bunch of Clinton aide emails. The state department came back … Continue reading
Dear feds: I ask for so little from you…
I hate to be a bother. I know you’re very busy. Breaking the U.S. economy, arming all the bad guys of the world while rendering your own citizens helpless, hell, just managing all the concentrated evil in the IRS alone … Continue reading
On the suggestions in the skirting thread…
It’ll be hard enough getting the skirting to look halfway decent, being as how the Lair is built on a slope. The only purpose of skirting the cabin is to keep wind from whistling through in winter, it won’t be … Continue reading
At some point, if you lecture and wag your finger at me enough, I’ll shrug and walk away.
I had this great post all lined up, or so I thought. A black chick – excuse me, Young Person of Color (POC) – maybe half as old as my favorite knife but not nearly half as experienced, took the … Continue reading
You know us nihilistic anarchists. We love to tear palaces down.
I dug all this stuff out yesterday, trying to find that dead rabbit that was making my life such a joy. These two piles do not by any means comprise the total nest, there’s still quite a bit more under … Continue reading
DAMMIT Little Bear!
I started smelling it day before yesterday, and I should have known. Somehow I misidentified it, I thought it was sewer gas. I convinced myself it was sewer gas. I should have known. I’ve smelled a corpse before. Honestly, crawling … Continue reading









































