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They say that Louis XIV had the inscription Ultima Ratio Regum cast into all the cannon of the French Army. It means “The Ultimate Argument of Kings,” and that always struck me as one of the most honest and up-front things any ruler or would-be ruler ever said. “We can dress it up prettier than this, but when it comes down to the unvarnished truth this is what it’s about: You’ll do as I say or I’ll send my goons to kill you.”
I thought about that for a long time. If there’s an ultimate argument, it seems only logical that there must be an ultimate answer. For years I thought the ultimate answer must be the bullets in my rifle, but it never seemed quite right. I’ve got bullets – he’s got frigging Cannon Balls. I mean, if there were three hundred million rifles throwing bullets at him, then maybe. But we all know that’s not going to happen. So if there’s an ultimate answer to his ultimate argument, it sure as hell ain’t bullets.
It finally came to me – and that’s when I abandoned the city and most of my stuff, and gave all that was behind me a good stiff Randian Shrug.
The ultimate answer to kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh.
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Monthly Archives: June 2016
Getting an early start while it’s cool…
This week has been all about yard clean-up. I had to haul out about 40 sandbags, rake much packrat nest rubbish out from under the cabin, move a lot of building materials I had foolishly stored under the cabin on … Continue reading
In 1971 I never met anybody with a George McGovern tattoo…
In fairness, I’d have probably thought it was cool. (But this one looks like a minor character in a Gilbert Shelton comic.) Anyone who can look at this tragic picture and not burst into laughter has no soul. https://t.co/ZE41nGgczk — … Continue reading
Poor Little Bear, #Many
On days like this I’m tempted to feel bad about adopting him. Then I remember he was born in Phoenix – so it was more in the way of a rescue.
Ode to a Cordless Drill
This is really basic to most of you guys. But you know, I’m not really a tool guy. Yeah, I know I was a dealership mechanic/votech teacher/tech instructor/tech writer/training developer and I owned a great big chest of tools but … Continue reading
Joel serves an eviction notice.
Sometime last spring, maybe, I scrounged an eight by eight metal roof off one of Former Neighbor J&H’s goat shelters, intending to raise it on poles over my workbench. Still think it was a good idea, problem is the thing … Continue reading
QoD: “See, this is why I should never read political news in the morning” edition
It’s early yet, but if Clinton successfully walks the tightrope we could experience a dramatic ideological reorganization. A Clinton coalition that mixes populist with establishmentarian, capturing both disgusted center-right Republicans and wary independent Sandernistas, could be the biggest tent American … Continue reading
Insert obvious joke about the report being due in 75 years…
Who (in the state department) did what and when did he/she do it? This is the sort of baffling mystery the state department was created to solve, and it will begin to get to the bottom of it the very … Continue reading
Ol’ Small Engine Joel
If it’s summer, D&L are probably mixing mud for another coat of adobe on their amazing house. Or trying to. They bought an old used mud-mixer that has given them a lot of service, but it hasn’t been entirely trouble-free. … Continue reading
It’s not the material, it’s the delivery.
Here’s the set-up: In its understandable desire to make some hay out of Her Royal Clintonness’ email scandal, the RNC filed a FOIA request with the state department for a bunch of Clinton aide emails. The state department came back … Continue reading
Dear feds: I ask for so little from you…
I hate to be a bother. I know you’re very busy. Breaking the U.S. economy, arming all the bad guys of the world while rendering your own citizens helpless, hell, just managing all the concentrated evil in the IRS alone … Continue reading
On the suggestions in the skirting thread…
It’ll be hard enough getting the skirting to look halfway decent, being as how the Lair is built on a slope. The only purpose of skirting the cabin is to keep wind from whistling through in winter, it won’t be … Continue reading
At some point, if you lecture and wag your finger at me enough, I’ll shrug and walk away.
I had this great post all lined up, or so I thought. A black chick – excuse me, Young Person of Color (POC) – maybe half as old as my favorite knife but not nearly half as experienced, took the … Continue reading
You know us nihilistic anarchists. We love to tear palaces down.
I dug all this stuff out yesterday, trying to find that dead rabbit that was making my life such a joy. These two piles do not by any means comprise the total nest, there’s still quite a bit more under … Continue reading
DAMMIT Little Bear!
I started smelling it day before yesterday, and I should have known. Somehow I misidentified it, I thought it was sewer gas. I convinced myself it was sewer gas. I should have known. I’ve smelled a corpse before. Honestly, crawling … Continue reading
“If I’d known there was a cedar rat convention in town…”
“I’d have hurried up more.” It’s Monday, our usual day for going into town and filling up on drinking water. What with the heat wave I had more than usual and so did D&L, and as it turned out we … Continue reading
No matter who gets the fire…
Seems like we get the smoke. It’s been smoky around here for the past couple of days, but today it’s so thick it’s actually interfering with the solar panels. Happens at least once every summer.
A modest proposal, which will heal the earth and reverse the rise of the oceans…
Supreme Court won’t let you implement your Clean Power Plan? No problem. How many nukes does the court have? Simply nationalize buy the plants and close them. No, really. Why not? Under Plan A, the federal government would buy or, … Continue reading
In case you were having trouble finding something to be angry with this morning…
I have no idea what this is all about, but a vision of lamp posts danced in my head… The honorary degree will be folded into five sharp corners and shoved where the moon don’t shine. In other news, Hillary … Continue reading
Good morning.
TUAK will resume as soon as I’ve consumed coffee and thought of something to say.
What an amateur this Obama fellow is…
After I have betrayed the revolution and set myself up as president-for-life, there’ll be a new rule that all politicians except myself who carefully phrase denials of things they’re clearly doing will go straight to the wall without even a … Continue reading









































