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They say that Louis XIV had the inscription Ultima Ratio Regum cast into all the cannon of the French Army. It means “The Ultimate Argument of Kings,” and that always struck me as one of the most honest and up-front things any ruler or would-be ruler ever said. “We can dress it up prettier than this, but when it comes down to the unvarnished truth this is what it’s about: You’ll do as I say or I’ll send my goons to kill you.”
I thought about that for a long time. If there’s an ultimate argument, it seems only logical that there must be an ultimate answer. For years I thought the ultimate answer must be the bullets in my rifle, but it never seemed quite right. I’ve got bullets – he’s got frigging Cannon Balls. I mean, if there were three hundred million rifles throwing bullets at him, then maybe. But we all know that’s not going to happen. So if there’s an ultimate answer to his ultimate argument, it sure as hell ain’t bullets.
It finally came to me – and that’s when I abandoned the city and most of my stuff, and gave all that was behind me a good stiff Randian Shrug.
The ultimate answer to kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh.
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Monthly Archives: June 2016
This is a little game I play with expendables…
“How long can I make it last?” I use wooden matches for lighting the woodstove, and also the propane stove. For some reason using the kitchen stove’s pilot lights runs through propane much faster than it seems like such small … Continue reading
Joel the Redneck Roofer
Former Neighbor J, when walking me around and telling me his concerns before he moved away and left me as caretaker, said to pay particular attention to the shingles on the windward side of the house. This house is naked … Continue reading
Little Bear gets a new walky lead.
It wasn’t entirely his fault. It was just a piece of cheap rope from Lowe’s, and it was pretty old. Yesterday morning we came upon a small herd of cattle, and there were calves, and LB forgot himself for just … Continue reading
Every time you do that, Joel, an angel cries.
It’s Saturday, so I knew when I got up that chances were I’d be going to town. I had quite a shopping list for the dollar store, as it happened. Got dressed and decided screw this, it’s gonna be hot … Continue reading
Improvisation
I’ve said it many times, I’m a scrounger. I scrounge. I produce very little garbage for the dump. The hipsters say “reduce, reuse, recycle and rot.” I say hipsters are pussies, but fortunately we have reduced our use of them … Continue reading
Oh, here we go…
They’ve been promising this for the past week. Uncle Joel’s going to spend the majority of his waking hours for the next week hiding from the sun. Because those are the temps in the shade, and there ain’t a lot … Continue reading
Prepping instruction for the complete idiot
This would be funny, if not for the body count among the innocents… Campfire demonstration goes awry resulting in explosion; 2 children severely burned Campers at the West Florida District Assembly of God Campground, 4792 U.S. 90, were assembled inside … Continue reading
It’s not a “mass shooting” when the government does it, Wendy.
Lefties are terrified when they see me with a gun, but comforted when they see a cop or a soldier with one. Makes sense… h/t
I guess I’m kind of guilty of this. But it’s worse when those other guys do it.
There’s a lovely big wildfire to the west…
It’s just causing haze on the horizon this morning, I should have taken a picture yesterday while it was making a big plume, much easier to see. Makes me glad I don’t live in any of those little towns that … Continue reading
Obama goes full Obama – women and minorities hardest hit.
Sing along! ♬ He’s a one trick pony. One trick is all that horse can do… ♬ What I and a lot of other gunhuggers have been screaming all week ‘defies common sense.’ No reason given, I guess it’s self-evident. … Continue reading
I prefer my visitors more polite, less destructive.
A herdlet came through my yard again. Among the usual knocked-over items and nice fresh cowpies I found that one had reconditioned the bridge to my burn barrels… And by ‘reconditioned,’ of course I mean broke. I hope it was … Continue reading
It’ll never fly.
Try this one on for size: anyone on a terrorist watch list should not be able to get welfare or Social Security. — David Burge (@iowahawkblog) June 16, 2016
Hey, Ian got a mention on Ace of Spades.
News You Can Use: All Your Flamethrower Questions Answered Funny how nobody ever tries to mug my friends.
” The lgbtq community could bring much needed fashion to the gun community.”
As Ed Driscoll pointed out yesterday, in the beginning was George Takai. Takai, once famously a Star Trek sidekick, has developed an apparently successful later-life career as a professional jackass. Like approximately 100% of all lefties everywhere, Takai decided that … Continue reading
You can have an opinion, Gersh. Go right ahead. Just try not to be a lying little sack of shit.
The unfortunate Gersh Kuntzman enjoyed all the negative attention so much he came back for seconds. To gun lovers, you can’t even have an opinion on assault rifles — unless it’s theirs. Here’s the proof To reiterate, the goal of … Continue reading
Look! Paid Content!
Well…sort of paid. I’m not sure how that works. But for the record I actually was offered (and accepted) a consideration for writing this post, and for putting a Wideners.com logo and link on my sidebar. That’s the very first … Continue reading
“Help! Mean words on Twitter!” says an actual terrorist.
Oh, this is rich. A firestorm of hate descending, mob of angry folks gathering with torches and pitchforks. I said: "Ban one gun." Right is touchy/defensive — Bill Ayers (@WilliamAyers) June 15, 2016 I don’t actually do Twitter so can’t … Continue reading
Just in case you thought republicans aren’t your enemy too…
Republicans Seek Wider FBI Surveillance Power After Orlando Senate Republicans are planning a renewed push in the wake of the Orlando massacre to expand the FBIs warrantless surveillance powers in terrorism investigations. Senator John Cornyn of Texas, the No. 2 … Continue reading









































